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WEDNESDAY 2/18 WEDNESDAY 2/18 Cabaret Christine ...

| 16 Feb 2015 | 06:34

    WEDNESDAY 2/18

    Cabaret

    Christine Ebersole enchants audiences w/renditions of Broadway faves & old standards; Feinstein's at the Regency, 540 Park Ave. (61st St.), 212-339-4095; 8:30, $60 & $30 min [repeats Thurs., Sun., Mon. & Tues. at 8:30, Fri. & Sat. at 8:30 & 11].

    Lucky Stiff "sucks you into a netherworld where you will be seduced by clowns & sexy sword swallowing strippers"?better leave the kids at home; Pussycat Lounge, 96 Greenwich St. (Rector St.), 212-349-4800; 9, $11.

    Norman's Big Night Out Norman Gosney pres. vaudeville reminiscent of Moulin Rouge (minus Nicole Kidman)?feat. singers, dancers, comedians, acrobats, jugglers & fire workers; Show, 135 W. 41st St. (betw. 6th Ave. & B'way), 212-278-0988; 9:30, $25.

    Comedy

    Addicted Billed as a "comedy of substance," Mark Lundholm's one-man show takes on fatherhood & drug addiction; Zipper Theater, 336 W. 37th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-239-6200; 8, $40 [repeats Thurs., Fri. & Tues. at 8, Sat. at 5 & 8, Sun. at 3 & 7].

    Peter Bales performs stand-up w/Carrie Karavas, Steve Byrne, Rob Magnotti & Jessica Kirson; Dangerfield's, 1118 1st Ave. (betw. 61st & 62nd Sts.), 212-593-1650; 8:45, $12.50-$20 [repeats Thurs. & Sun. at 8:45, Fri. at 8:30 & 10:30, Sat. at 8, 10:30 & 12:30 a.m.].

    Boxed Laughter Stand-up comedy solves all your problems w/laughter; Jack Dempsey's Pub, 36 W. 33rd St. (betw. 5th & 6th Aves.), 212-629-9899; 8, $5 & 1 drink min.

    Invite Them Up Original stand-up hosted by Eugene Mirman & Bobby Tisdale; RiFiFi, 332 E. 11th St. (betw. 1st & 2nd Aves.), 212-677-5368; 8, $5 sugg. don.

    Robert Kelly offers his crude, albeit hysterical, brand of stand-up; Carolines on Broadway, 1626 B'way (betw. 49th & 50th Sts.), 212-757-4100; 8, $16.50 & 2 drink min.

    Colin Quinn Funny man performs stand-up w/Dov Davidoff, Sherrod Small, Godfrey & Robert Kelly; Comedy Cellar, 117 MacDougal St. (betw. Bleecker & W. 3rd Sts.), 212-254-3480; 9 & 11, $10-$15 & 2 drink min. [repeats Thurs. & Sun. at 9 & 11, Fri. at 9, 10:45 & 12:30 a.m., Sat. at 7:30, 9:15, 11 & 12:45 a.m.].

    The Rejection Show Jon Friedman & Adam Cole-Kelly host this monthly staple, built around comic bits & cartoons rejected by everyone from SNL to The New Yorker; the Tank, 432 W. 42nd St. (betw. 9th & 10th Aves.), 212-868-4444; 8, $5.

    "Revolutionary Chickens" Rob Lok's one-man comic take on his family's experiences escaping communist China moves to Wednesdays; Palace of Variety, 125 W. 42nd St. (betw. B'way & 6th Aves.), 877-246-3537; 9:30, $10.

    Dance

    Gina Gibney Dance premieres Gibney's new work about disruption, Thrown. You know, your basic need & reject, depend & resist, fall & get up stuff; the Duke, 229 W. 42nd St. (betw. 7th & 8th Aves.), 212-415-5552; 8, $20 [repeats Thurs.-Sat. at 8].

    Israeli Folk-Dance Madness Ruth Goodman & Danny Uziel hold a lesson from 7-8 & then open up the floor to rythmic mayhem; 92nd St. Y, 1395 Lexington Ave. (92nd St.), 212-415-5500; 7, $12.

    Peggy Piacenza in "For Who I Am" w/post-performance discussion; Dance Theater Workshop, 219 W. 19th St. (betw. 7th & 8th Aves.), 212-924-0077; 7 [through 2/18] [repeats Thurs. at 7].

    Sydney Dance Company pres. NYC premiere of Graeme Murphy's "Eliipse"...BYOB (AC/DC & football hooligans provided); Joyce Theater, 175 8th Ave. (19th St.), 212-242-0800; call for times & prices [repeats Thurs.-Sat. at 8, mats. Sat. & Sun. at 2].

    THURSDAY 2/19

    Cabaret

    Cat Fight! Lacey Langston treats us to the true story of the "divine feud between Bette Davis & Joan Crawford"; Rose's Turn, 55 Grove St. (betw. 7th Ave. & Christopher St.), 212-366-5438; 9, $12.

    "The Rat Pack Review" No, not P. Diddy & Ashton Kutcher! Kevin James & Frank Bray perform hits by the real boys, "ol' blue eyes" & the dashing Dean?plus, comedy from Al Del Bene; Nolita Tavern, 30 Spring St. (Mott St.), 917-237-1901; 9 & 11, free .

    Starshine Burlesque Master Jack Fetterman & the Meat Mistress join Dirty Martini & Eva Svensson; RiFiFi, 332 E. 11th St. (betw. 1st & 2nd Aves.), 212-677-5368; 10, $5.

    Nora York pushes the creative envelope w/her "post-modern cabaret"; Joe's Pub, 425 Lafayette St. (betw. E. 4th St. & Astor Pl.), 212-539-8778; 7:30, $20.

    Comedy

    Automatic Vaudeville Weekly comedy/variety show w/Hilly & Gavin Souchet; Ars Nova, 511 W. 54th St. (betw. 10th & 11th Aves.), 212-981-9722; 10, $5.

    Comedy Soapbox NYC stand-up favs up on the stand-up soapbox; Nevada Smith's, 74 3rd Ave. (betw. 11th & 12th Sts.), 212-982-2591; 9, $10.

    Happy Hour Diverse and funny stand-up show; Downstairs at Porters, 216 7th Ave. (betw. 22nd & 23rd Sts.), 212-229-2878; 8, $7, 1 item min.

    Italian Mamas Two one-woman shows about growing up Italian, Tracy Esposito's "Chicken Parmigiana" & Darlene Violetta's "Fortunata"; Producer's Club, 358 W. 44th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-352-3101; 7:30, $20.

    Jay Mohr takes a break from his ESPN gig to yuk it up; Carolines on Broadway, 1626 B'way (betw. 49th & 50th Sts.), 212-757-4100; 8 & 10, $45-$48.50 & 2 drink min. [repeats Sun. at 8 & 10, Sat. at 8 & 10:30].

    Thursday Night Comedy Show Hogwild hosts a set of new comics each week; Hiroko's Place, 75 Thompson St. (betw. Spring & Broome Sts.), 212-625-1303; 8, 1 item min.

    Dance

    Danspace Project pres. Pam Tanowitz's Love Storyless, a hybrid of ballet & modern dance representing conflicting forces that move us through "today's post-everything landscape"; Danspace Project at St. Mark's Church, 131 E. 10th St. (2nd Ave.), 212-674-0910, RSVP 212-674-8194; 8:30, $15 [repeats Fri., Sat. & Sun. at 8:30].

    FRIDAY 2/20

    Cabaret

    The Bindlestiff Family Cirkus Winter Cabaret Winter line-up of eclectic troupe of vaudeville virtuosos, feat. talented members of Ringling Bros. & Cirque du Soleil; Palace of Variety, 125 W. 42nd St. (betw. B'way & 6th Aves.), 877-246-3537; 11, $15 [repeats Sat., through 2/28].

    An Evening by the Bijou feat. the Isotoners, a satirical gay cabaret punk band w/songs about dating foreign men, the L train & teen runaways; La MaMa E.T.C., 74A E. 4th St. (betw. Bowery & 2nd Ave.), 212-475-7710; 10, $15 [repeats Sat., Sun. at 5:30].

    Floating Vaudeville Night Von Von Von hosts tango-trapezeing, rowdy, raunchy fun?"ya gonna luv it"; Galapagos, 70 N. 6th St. (betw. Wythe & Kent Aves.), Williamsburg, 718-782-5188; 10 p.m.-1 a.m., $5.

    Happy Hour Salon Singer/comic Joanna Parson hosts performer salon feat. novelist Lynn Harris, singers Erica Ash & Julie Foldesi, comic Rena Zager & ventriloquist Karl Herlinger; Siberia, 356 W. 40th St. (9th Ave.), 212-333-4141; 6, $5.

    The Karaoke Show The Donkey Show creators bring you their rendition of The Comedy of Errors?feel free to rock the mic or grind after the show; China Club, 268 W. 47th St. (8th Ave.), 212-398-3800; 7, $35-$55 [repeats Sat.].

    The Match GAYme: LIVE! Wacky game show send-up w/audience participation, real prizes & celeb impersonators galore; Duplex, 61 Christopher St. (7th Ave.), 212-255-5438; 11, $15 & 2 drink min.

    Comedy

    Kate Clinton tackles life & lesbian issues with her observational humor; Carolines on Broadway, 1626 B'way (betw. 49th & 50th Sts.), 212-757-4100; 8 & 10:30, $24.50 & 2 drink min.

    Komedy Kebob Tim Brennan & Pat Rigby host weekly stand-up night?"come for the comedy, stay for the strippers"; Pussycat Lounge, 96 Greenwich St. (Rector St.), 212-349-4800; 7, free .

    Let's Get This Damn Thing Over With! Liz Thompson's one-woman show about growing up in NYC in the 1970s & 80s; the Tank, 432 W. 42nd St. (betw. 9th & 10th Aves.), 212-868-4444; 10, $7.

    The McKellog Report Improv show feat. "news you can't trust"; Gotham City Improv, 158 W. 23rd St., 2nd fl. (betw. 6th & 7th Aves.), 212-367-8222; 9, $7.

    The Mosaic A cast of funny, whip smart improv comics build a show out of random ideas suggested by audience members (ie, they're making this stuff up as they go); Under St. Marks, 94 St. Marks Pl. (betw. Ave. A & 1st Ave.), 212-696-7949; 8, $7.

    The Next Big Broadway Musical Imrovised two-act musical comedy, where audience participation is a must; Don't Tell Mama, 343 W. 46th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-757-0788; 9, $10 & 2 drink min.

    Piece of Bullshit Pie "The truth is bitter?bullshit pie is delicious!"; Upright Citizens Brigade Theater, 307 W. 26th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves), 212-366-9176; 8, $7.

    "Sara Schaefer is Obsessed With You" Improv/sketch comedy in "talk show" format explores the subject of "obsessions & deep-down hidden feelings"; the Sage Theater, 711 7th Ave. (48th St.), 212-382-8818; 10, $8, $6 st./s.c.

    Steal This Show "Guaranteed to change your life & give you at least one viable idea," paying is for suckers!; People's Improv Theater, 154 W. 29th St. (betw. 6th & 7th Aves.), 212-563-7488; 8, $6.

    William Stephenson hosts stand-up feat. Kurt Metzger, Ellen Cleghorn, Rick Mann, Vanessa Hollingshead & Cory Kahaney; Comic Strip Live, 1568 2nd Ave. (betw. 81st & 82nd Sts.), 212-861-9386; 8:30, 10:30 & 12.30 a.m., $17 & $12 min.

    Sweet Paprika Weekly comedy show w/special guests; Village Lantern, 167 Bleecker St. (betw. Thompson & Sullivan Sts.), 212-260-7993; 8:30, $5.

    3-Way Mexican Lei Try the Berkovits wit & the nachos grande?also, stand-up from Floridian Duncan Jay & Long Islander Allegra Barnett; Maui Tacos, 330 5th Ave. (betw. 32nd & 33rd Sts.), 212-868-9720; 8, 6:30 sign-up, 1 item min.

    Dance

    For Whom Am I A vibrant theatrical piece by Kristin Varner, humorously choreographed by Peggy Piacenza & scored by Fred Frith, plus?post-performance discussion; Dance Theater Workshop, 219 W. 19th St. (betw. 7th & 8th Aves.), 212-924-0077; 7, $25 [repeats Sat. at 7].

    Nijinsky The critically acclaimed ballet by John Neumeier, celebrates the life & legend of Vaslav Nijinsky, the "God of the Dance"; City Center, 131 W. 55th St. (betw. 6th & 7th Aves.), 212-581-1212; 8, $35-75 [repeats Sat. at 8 & Sun mat. at 2].

    Thunderbird American Indian Dancers' 41st Season kicks off tonight w/concert & pow wow; Theater for the New City, 155 1st Ave. (betw. 9th & 10th Sts.), 212-254-1109; Fri. & Sat. at 8, mats. Sun. at 2 & 5, don.

    SATURDAY 2/21

    Cabaret

    Cavalcade of Youth Special showcase for young performers, incl. dancers, jugglers & acrobats; Palace of Variety, 125 W. 42nd St. (betw. B'way & 6th Aves.), 877-246-3537; 2, $10.

    "Coney Island Freak Show" feat. classic freaks & human curiosities incl. fire & sword swallower Tyler Fyre, bug eater Insectivora, Python charmer Serpentina & glass muncher Professor Scott Baker?plus dirty jokes & legions of strippers; Cutting Room, 19 W. 24th St. (betw. B'way & 6th Ave.), 212-691-1900; 10, $15.

    Glorya Wholesome's Living Legends feat. the Angelic Miss Evangeline, tunes by Evil DJ GRIM & all your favorite living legends; Now Bar, 22 7th Ave. S. (Leroy St.), 212-293-0323; 10, $15-$20.

    Judy Garland & Liza Minnelli Live! Dead-on impersonations of Judy & Liza by Tommy Femia & Christine Pedi; Don't Tell Mama, 343 W. 46th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-757-0788; 11, $20 & 2 drink min.

    Le Scandal Striptease, magic & sideshow acts put "downtown edge & dash of Coney Island" on nouveau burlesque & vaudeville show; Cutting Room, 19 W. 24th St. (betw. B'way & 6th Ave.), 212-691-1900; 10, $20.

    Sinatra Saturdays Cary Hoffman performs Sinatra classics w/the Stan Rubin Orchestra; Carnegie Club, 156 West 56th St. (betw. 6th & 7th Aves.), 212-957-9676; 8 & 10, $30 & 2 drink min.

    Va Va Voom Room Miss Astrid's erotic night of burlesque, va va vaudeville, strippers, magicians & clowns returns w/dancer Julie Atlas Muz, Tigger the stripper & fire chief Kari Dexter; Fez/Time Cafe, 380 Lafayette St. (Great Jones St.), 212-533-7000; 10:30, $18 & 2 drink min.

    The Wau Wau Sisters Will Do Anything for Love The sisters' burlesque show returns to NYC & makes Valentine's Day last all month; Cutting Room, 19 W. 24th St. (betw. B'way & 6th Ave.), 212-691-1900; 8, $15.

    Comedy

    All Aboard the U.S.S. Boatship Elephant Larry group pres. new maritime-themed sketch show; the Kraine Theater, 85 E. 4th St. (betw. 2nd & 3rd Aves.), 212-539-7686; 8, $10, $7 st.

    The Brooklyn Brew-Ha-Ha Ophira Eisenberg emcees stand-up by Susan Prekel, Larry Getlen, Erin Foley, Rena Zager, James Patterson & more; Boudoir Bar at East End Ensemble, 273 Smith St. (betw. Sackett & Degraw Sts.), Carroll Gardens, 718-624-8878; 9:30, $5 & 2 drink min.

    Ray Ellin emcees stand-up from Kerry McNally, Tim Young, Johnny Lampert, Cory Kahaney, Ellen Cleghorn & JJ Ramirez; Comic Strip Live, 1568 2nd Ave. (betw. 81st & 82nd Sts.), 212-861-9386; 6, 8, 10:15 & 12.30 a.m., $17 & $12 min.

    Ms. Jackson/Feathers & Flannel "Dripping wet gay improv"?just the way we like it?feat. Heather Gay, Lauren Palmigiano & Louie Pearlman; People's Improv Theater, 154 W. 29th St. (betw. 6th & 7th Aves.), 212-563-7488; 8, $8.

    No Name & a Bag o' Chips "NYC's best damn comedy/variety show" gives away free bags of chips, raffles off door prizes & tells a lot of jokes; Common Basis Theater, 750 8th Ave. (46th St.), 212-414-5420; 11:30, free .

    Dance

    "Fuente Flamenca" Fiery production?live flamenco music, dance, singing & intimacy?all en fuego; Alegrias Restaurant, 239 W. 14th St. (betw. 7th & 8th Aves.), 917-880-9737; 8:30 & 11:00, $10.

    Africa in the Americas Peru-Negro makes its long-awaited NY debut; Town Hall, 123 W. 43rd St. (betw. 6th & 7th Aves.), 212-840-2824; 8, $25-40.

    SUNDAY 2/22

    Cabaret

    Let's Duet: A Celebration of Friendship & Song Singers Connie Pachl & Bill Daugherty perform Broadway & jazz standards w/several original pieces; Don't Tell Mama, 343 W. 46th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-757-0788; 9, $15 & 2 drink min.

    Kate Shindle performs her show "Me and My Shadow - Songs I've Heard in Pageants," w/numbers by everyone from William Finn to Frank Wildhorn; Ars Nova, 511 W. 54th St. (betw. 10th & 11th Aves.), 212-981-9722; 7, $15.

    Comedy

    Damaged Care Musical meds Greg LaGana & Barry Levy take on healthcare in the U.S. Did someone call for a singing doctor?; Danny's Skylight Room, 346 W. 46th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-265-8133; 2, $10 & $10 min.

    Gotham City Improv Shampoo Rinse Repeat, Crux, How Bazaar & pembo! groups in two-hour improv show; Gotham City Improv, 158 W. 23rd St., 2nd fl. (betw. 6th & 7th Aves.), 212-367-8222; 7:30, $5.

    Gotham City Sketch Ensemble New sketch comedy show; Gotham City Improv, 158 W. 23rd St., 2nd fl. (betw. 6th & 7th Aves.), 212-367-8222; 9:30, $5.

    Pussy Hut We're noticing a trend in the names of Todd Montesi's raw Sunday night stand-up showcase?and we like it! John Shin's open mic starts off the evening (8 p.m.); Village Ma, 107 MacDougal St. (betw. Bleecker & W. 3rd Sts.), 212-529-3808; 9:30, 1 drink min.

    MONDAY 2/23

    Cabaret

    An Evening with Burton & Russell In the tradition of French & Saunders, Arnie Burton & Jay Russell pres. tour de force of sharp plays, songs & sketches?proceeds benefit Rattlestick Playwrights Theater; Rattlestick Theater, 224 Waverly Pl. (betw. Perry & 11th Sts.), 212-353-7716; 8, $25.

    Live Jazz Nights feat. Mercy Monet performing classic & contemporary jazz. Mention NY Press for a 10% discount on food; Fuzion On A, 211 Ave. A (E. 13th St.), 212-533-5188; 7-10, $10 min.

    Show & Tell Those crazy O'Debra Twins host a "wet & wild open mic" as performers "have seven minutes in heaven to do whatever the heck they want"; Bowery Poetry Club, 308 Bowery (betw. Bleecker & Houston Sts.), 212-614-0505; 10, $3.

    Subjective Theatre Benefit Belly dancers, hip-hoppers Concrete Soul, magician Jeff Grow & burlesque acts come together to suppport the Subjective Theatre; Bar 13, 35 E. 13th St. (University Pl.), 212-979-6677; 7, $10 incl. free drink.

    Barbara Walsh pres. "No Standards," an eclectic collection of tunes from everyone from Jacques Brel to Paul McCartney; Joe's Pub, 425 Lafayette St. (betw. E. 4th St. & Astor Pl.), 212-539-8778; 7, $25.

    Comedy

    "Blue Mondays" Tony Woods pres. super stand-up from Todd Lynn, Dean Edwards, Steve Byrne, Kyle Grooms, Dawnel Rawlings & Rondel Hartley; Boston Comedy Club, 82 W. 3rd St. (betw. Thompson & Sullivan Sts.), 212-477-1000; 9:30, $5 & 1 drink min.

    Eating It Host Sean Conroy welcomes Carmen Lynch, Linas Phillips, Todd Glass, Rob Paravonian, Sherry Davey & Vince Morris to the stage; Luna Lounge, 171 Ludlow St. (betw. Houston & Stanton Sts.), 212-260-2323; 8:30, $8 incl. free drink.

    Ray Ellin performs stand-up alongside Pete Correale, Richie Byrne, Sherrod Small & Rob Magnotti; Dangerfield's, 1118 1st Ave. (betw. 61st & 62nd Sts.), 212-593-1650; 8:45, $12.50 [repeats Tues.].

    Girls, Girls, Girls It isn't a new burlesque?it's NYC's funniest female stand-up comics ripping it up; Gotham Comedy Club, 34 W. 22nd St. (betw. 5th & 6th Aves.), 212-367-9000; 8:30, $10 & 2 drink min.

    Colin Quinn Funny man performs stand-up w/Greg Giraldo, Sherrod Small, Godfrey & Robert Kelly; Comedy Cellar, 117 MacDougal St. (betw. Bleecker & W. 3rd Sts.), 212-254-3480; 9 & 11, $10 & 2 drink min. [repeats Tues. at 9 & 11].

    Dance

    Dance Jam Children's Aid Society's weekly improvisational event is open to all forms of movement & movers w/or w/out background in modern or other dance forms, contact improv, martial arts, acting, or release techniques?beginners, disabled, all are welcome; Children's Aid Society, 219 Sullivan St. (betw. W. 3rd & Bleecker Sts.), 212-254-3074; 8:15, $8.

    Movement Research pres. Mariangela Lopez w/her performance art piece Wonders of Progress & Ann Robideaux & Paula Plessas showing Baggage Claim, a commentary on life's inner journey; Judson Memorial Church, 55 Washington Sq. S. (betw. Thompson & Sullivan Sts.), 212-477-0351; 8, free.

    TUESDAY 2/24

    Cabaret

    Lilly Lipid's Open Mic Variety Night Share the stage w/acrobats, jugglers, magicians, dancers, clowns, drag kings & queens, creepy mimes & aerialists, or just sit back & enjoy the madness; Palace of Variety, 125 W. 42nd St. (betw. B'way & 6th Aves.), 877-246-3537; 9:30, 9 sign-up, $5.

    Comedy

    Chopshtick Gotham continues w/the demographic groups?this time it's NYC's funniest Asians feat. Vijay Nathan, Eliot Chang & Ryo Koike?Rahul Siddarth emcees; Gotham Comedy Club, 34 W. 22nd St. (betw. 5th & 6th Aves.), 212-367-9000; 8:30, $10 & 2 drink min.

    Funny Film Shorts They're short films that are, err, funny; Carolines on Broadway, 1626 B'way (betw. 49th & 50th Sts.), 212-757-4100; 7, $12 & 2 drink min.

    Dance

    Flamenco Nuevo Compania Maria Pages performs the evocative "Flamenco Republic" & the surreal "El perro Andaluz. Burlerias"; Joyce Theater, 175 8th Ave. (19th St.), 212-242-0800; 8, $38.

    THEATER

    IN PREVIEWS

    Beautiful Child Nicky Silver's story of "a troubled teacher returning home to his family, who must love and accept who he has become"; Vineyard Theatre, 108 E. 15th St. (Park Ave. S.), 212-353-0303; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, mats. Sat. & Sun. at 3, $50 [opens 2/24].

    Big Bill "Bill Tilden was considered one of the greatest tennis players of all time, dominating the sport in the 1920s by winning seven U.S. championships. He was also a closeted homosexual"; Mitzi E. Newhouse Theater, 150 W. 46th (betw. 6th & 7th Aves.) call for times, $60 [opens 2/22, through 5/16].

    Fiddler on the Roof Alfred Molina stars as Tevye...although you can get the same thing, plus potato pancakes & a smokin' version of "Satisfaction" over at Sammy's Roumanian on Chrystie St.; Minskoff Theatre, 200 W. 45th St. (7th Ave.), 212-307-4100; call for times [opens 2/26].

    Magic Hands Freddy Why bother describing the plot or other players? Let's just cut to the chase and say this thing stars Ralph Macchio; Soho Playhouse, 15 Vandam St. (6th Ave.), 212-691-1555; call for times, $45-$50 [opens 2/19].

    RECENTLY OPENED

    Aunt Dan and Lemon Wallace Shawn, star of Princess Bride, co-author of My Dinner with Andre & son of famed New Yorker editor William Shawn, offers new production of his "political horror story"; Kirk Theater, 410 W. 42nd St. (betw. 9th & 10th Aves.), 212-279-4200; call for times, $50 [through 3/27].

    The Ballad of Round Eyes New play by Stacey Engels w/bitchin' psychedelic poster; American Theatre of Actors, 314 W. 54th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-868-4444; call for times & prices [through 2/29].

    Birdy A new play by Naomi Wallace, adapted from the novel by William Wharton (which the Nick Cage film was based on); the Women's Project Theatre, 424 W. 55th St. (betw. 9th & 10th Aves.), 212-239-6200; call for times, $45.

    Carnival Knowledge "A gasp-inducing journey into the subculture of circus and sideshow"; Soho Playhouse, 15 Vandam St. (6th Ave.), 212-691-1555; call for times, $35-$45.

    Cat on a Hot Tin Roof Starring Ashley Judd, Jason Patric & Ned Beatty; Music Box Theatre, 239 W. 45th St. (6th Ave.), 212-239-6200; call for times, $86.25-$66.25.

    Crown Heights "Inspired by the still unresolved events of 1991 in the neighborhood that became synonymous w/racial strife"; All Stars Project, 543 W. 42nd St. (betw. 10th & 11th Aves.), 212-941-1234; call for times, $25-$35 [through 3/7].

    Dolphin Up a Tree Children's musical feat. Tina Talkington, who turns herself into many things incl. a dolphin & a tree; 78th Street Theater Lab, 236 W. 78th St. (B'way), 212-873-9050; Sun. at 11 a.m., $12.95 [through 4/8].

    Double Infidelity Neoclassical farce by Marivaux; Theatre 80, 80 St. Mark's Pl. (betw. 1st & 2nd Aves.), 212-598-9802; call for times, $75 [through 3/21].

    The Duchess of Malfi Always reminds one of that English class in college where your gay-male peer grabbed your face & kissed you open-mouthed to "prove a point about the text"...a remark that nobody, incl. the professor, understood?right, girls?; St. Peter's Church, 346 W. 20th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-691-6263; Weds.-Sat. at 8, $15.

    The Falcon's Magic Feather Children's theater piece about princess & enchanted falcon based on Russian folklore; Vital Theatre Co., 432 W. 42nd St. (betw. 9th & 10th Aves.), 212-268-2040; mats. Sat. at 1, Sun. at 1 & 3, $14 [through 3/28].

    Going to the River 2004 Ruby Dee & Philip Rose in annual reading series of new plays by African-American women; Ensemble Studio Theater, 549 W. 52nd St. (betw. 10th & 11th Aves.), 212-206-1515; call for times & prices [through 2/22].

    Golda's Balcony Tova Feldshuh portrays "the rise of Golda Meir from impoverished Russian schoolgirl to prime minister"; Helen Hayes Theatre, 240 W. 44th St. (betw. 7th & 8th Aves.), 212-239-6200; call for times & prices.

    The Gruffalo London's "Tall Stories Theatre Company" pres. musical version of award-winning picture book by same name; New Victory Theater, 209 W. 42nd St. (betw. B'way & 8th Ave.), 212-239-6200; call for times, $10-$30 [through 2/22].

    Gutenberg: The Musical! "The true story of Johann Gutenberg?the man who invented the printing press" (shit, we thought this was about Police Academy cadet, Steve); Upright Citizens Brigade Theater, 307 W. 26th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves), 212-366-9176; Weds. at 8 [through 2/25].

    The Ladies examines "dictator-brides" Elena Ceausescu, Imedla Marcos, Eva Peron & Jiang Qing; Dixon Place at Chashama, 111 W. 42nd St. (betw. 6th & 7th Aves.), 212-219-0736; call for times, $10-$25 [through 2/29].

    The Life and Times of Barry Goldhubris "A man's ego gets so big, he explodes!"; P.S. 122, 150 1st Ave. (9th St.), 212-477-5288; Thurs.-Sat. at 7:30, Sun. at 5 [through 2/22].

    Lobby Hero A "New York morality play"; Gallery Players, 199 14th St. (betw. 4th & 5th Aves.), Park Slope, 718-595-0547; call for times, $12-$15 [through 3/7].

    The Mammy Project "Artist confronts the stereotype of mammy"; Palace of Variety, 125 W. 42nd St. (betw. B'way & 6th Aves.), 877-246-3537; Sun. at 5, Mon. at 8, $15 [through 2/29].

    Matt & Ben "What if the only thing standing between you and destiny was Ben Affleck?"; P.S. 122, 150 1st Ave. (9th St.), 212-477-5288; call for times, $22.50.

    Max Morath: Ragtime and Again Songs of Scott Joplin, Eubie Blake, Hoagy Carmichael, George Gershwin & Irving Berlin; York Theatre, 619 Lexington Ave. (54th St.), 212-615-6966; call for times, $50 [through 3/14].

    Mercury: The Afterlife and Times of a Rock God One-man show all about everyone's favorite Queen, Freddy Mercury; the Triad, 158 W. 72nd St. (betw. Amsterdam & Columbus Aves.), 212-362-2590; Sun. at 7, $30 [through 3/21].

    Moms "Veteran stage and television actress Clarice Taylor is resurrecting America's first female stand-up comedienne, Jackie "Moms" Mabley, for the off-Broadway stage"; Kirk Theater, 410 W. 42nd St. (betw. 9th & 10th Aves.), 212-279-4200; call for times & prices.

    Moo! The Twisted Tale of Dinky Farms "Animal Farm meets 'Looney Tunes'"; Manhattan Theatre Source, 177 MacDougal St. (W. 8th St.), 212-501-4751; Weds.-Sat. at 8, $15.

    Mother Courage and Her Children Bertolt Brecht on war; Classical Theater of Harlem, 645 St. Nicholas Ave. (141st St.), 212-868-4444; Weds.-Sat. at 8, mat. Sun. at 3, $19 [through 2/29].

    The Musical of Musicals?The Musical! "In a comic satire of musical theater genres, one story becomes five musicals, each in the distinctive style of a different master of the form, from Rodgers and Hammerstein to Stephen Sondheim"; St. Peter's Church, 619 Lexington Ave. (54th St.), 212-935-2200; call for times, $20-$50.

    My Big Gay Italian Wedding Needless to say, the plot revolves around a few obstacles to a traditional Catholic affair...; Actor's Playhouse, 100 7th Ave. S. (betw. Bleecker & Christopher Sts.), 212-239-6200; Fri. at 10, mat. Sat. at 3, $40 [through 2/28].

    My Life with Albertine Musical based on Remembrance of Things Past; Playwrights Horizons, 416 W. 42nd St. (betw. 9th & 10th Aves.), 212-279-4200; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, Sun. at 7:30, mats. Sat. & Sun. at 3, $15-$60 [through 3/13].

    No Exodus "A barefoot and stuttering Shepard is approached by God and asked to go back to Egypt to confront the powerful Pharaoh. Armed with little more than a phrase, 'I am that I am,' he unhappily obliges"; John Houseman Theater, 450 W. 42nd St. (betw. 9th & 10th Aves.), 212-206-1515; call for times & prices.

    The Nuclear Family You decide which family member each of these three men portray, they make up the songs; Zipper Theater, 336 W. 37th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-239-6200; call for times, $20.

    The Parrot New musical inspired by old Italian folktale as part of the "Give Us Your Children" series; the Flea Theater, 41 White St. (betw. B'way & Church St.), 212-206-1515; call for times, $5-$20 [through 2/22].

    Pericles A Theatre for a New Audience Production; BAM Harvey Theater, 651 Fulton St. (betw. Rockwell & Ashland Pls.), 718-636-4100; call for times, $25-$60 [through 2/28].

    The Roaring Girlie New adaptation of 1611 comedy about "Moll Cutpurse, 17th century London's most notorious cross-dresser and 'governess of the underworld'"; Baruch Performing Arts Center, Nagelberg Theater, 250 E. 25th St. (Lexington Ave.), 212-387-1136; call for times & prices [through 3/21].

    The Seven Husbands of Harriet Goldberg All eight characters appear to be played by the same actor...; Palace of Variety, 125 W. 42nd St. (betw. B'way & 6th Aves.), 877-246-3537; Thurs. at 8, $20, $15 st./s.c.

    Sleepless Fishes "An elctro-accordian, pirate-puppet sea odyssey"?what, no shanties?; Bowery Poetry Club, 308 Bowery (betw. Bleecker & Houston Sts.), 212-614-0505; Fri. at 10, $7 [through 3/5].

    Spokesong is set in Northern Ireland during the turbulent 1970s; Storm Theatre, 145 W.46th St. (betw. 6th & 7th Aves.), 212-868-4444; call for times, $19 [through 2/28].

    States of Shock Sam Shepard's latest is a timely play about war; the Abingdon Theatre, 312 W. 36th St. (8th Ave.), 877-737-3285; Weds.-Sat. at 8, mat. Sun. at 3, $15 [through 2/29].

    The Stendhal Syndrome Isabella Rossellini & Richard Thomas star in latest by Terrence McNally; Primary Stages, 354 W. 45th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-333-4052; call for times & prices.

    The Strawberry One-Act Festival kicks off 10th season; Producer's Club II, 616 9th Ave. (betw. W. 43rd & W. 44th Sts.), 212-868-4444; call for times & prices.

    Tangomania "A tango love triangle in music, song and dance"; Thalia Spanish Theatre, 41-17 Greenpoint Ave. (betw. 41st & 42nd Sts.), Sunnyside, 718-729-3880; Thurs.-Sat. at 8, mat. Sun. at 4, $25-$30 [through 3/28].

    Vincent "A new, revised musical about the life of Vincent Van Gogh"...only in New York, kids!; Wings Theatre, 154 Christopher St. (Washington St.), 212-502-0318; call for times, $19.

    What's Your Karma? English clairvoyant Lilith Dove selects audience members at random (via raffle) to reveal their past lives & "hidden talents"; Producer's Club, 358 W. 44th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-352-3101; call for times, $35 [through 2/20].

    Who Killed Woody Allen Drew & loads of Woody's exes have schlepped downtown to see it behind his back?why not you?; the Triad, 158 W. 72nd St. (betw. Amsterdam & Columbus Aves.), 212-362-2590; call for times & prices [through 3/6].

    Wicked New musical inspired by the novel inspired by the novel/movie The Wizard of Oz (& starring Joel Grey); Gershwin Theatre, 222 W. 51st St. (6th Ave.), 212-307-4100; call for times, $40-$100.

    The Wild Duck Ibsen's tale of an idyllic farm, an invalid, the duck she keeps as a pet & the arrival of a mysterious young man?far out!; Jean Cocteau Repertory, 330 Bowery (Bond St.), 212-677-0060; call for times & prices [through 3/20].

    Women on Fire Starring Judith Ivey; Cherry Lane Theater, 38 Commerce St. (Bleecker St.), 212-206-1515; Weds.-Sat. at 8, mats. Sat. & Sun. at 2, $35.