The Road to the White House

Call it an experiment in precognitive city planning (you sure don't see those very often!). It's goofy, and there ain't no art to it.

If you happen to find yourself near Grand Army Plaza on a nice day and you have a few hours to kill, try this out. Follow Prospect Park W. south along the park until you hit President St. Turn west, and follow President until you escape Park Slope and breach the raggedy borders of Red Hook. You'll hit the canal along the way, but President picks up on the other side. The walk's about 12 blocks altogether.

There, you'll find yourself at the intersection of President and Clinton. I think most everybody knows about that one by now?especially since the Times?and so many other places?ran a picture of the street signs not long after the 1992 election.

Turn left and begin following Clinton St. south. Here's where things get interesting. After 11 blocks, strolling through a very colorful, picturesque neighborhood and beneath the Gowanus Expressway, you'll run into?yes, indeed?Bush St.

This is where?if you're like me?you start thinking, Hmmmmm...

Could there be a pattern to it? Could the intersections of various Brooklyn streets be linked somehow, revealing the future of the American presidency, should we ever dare stop to read the signs?

Bush St.'s a shortie?only three blocks long?though I don't know if that means anything or not. To the west, it runs along the Red Hook Recreation Area until it hits Henry St.

Henry, Henry, I thought, seeing if I could conjure up any likely names. Nothing that I could think of. Then again, I pay pitifully sparse attention to the political news, so maybe I was the wrong person to be doing this.

To the east from the Clinton intersection, Bush very quickly runs into Court St.

Now that makes sense, I thought. Just to make sure, though, I followed the last block of Bush, which ended at Smith St.

Bush never crossed Gore or Cheney or Powell Sts.?the three obvious choices?so I decided to follow Court St. It's where his presidency began, after all. Would it be where it ended, too? I figured I'd let the streets tell me.

Following Court north, you hit Creamer (hmmmm...), Lorraine, Bush again, Centre, Garnet and Huntington.

None of them were ringing any immediate bells?but again, I might not be the right person for the job. I could still speculate wildly, though. Because of the Court, will he end up more in the Centre than he is right now? Or, perhaps, will the 2004 elections deliver unto us our first female president? Some woman named Lorraine?

Okay, so no one knows for sure, and we won't know for another four years. But maybe then we could walk the streets of Red Hook again and see just how prescient they were.

More interesting than reading goddamned tea leaves, I'll give you that.