STAGE WEDNESDAY 11/13 Cabaret Steve Ross Singer & pianist ...
Cabaret
Steve Ross Singer & pianist reinvents classics from Cole Porter, Irving Berlin, the Gershwins, Charles Trenet & Noël Coward; Stanhope Park Hyatt, 995 5th Ave. (betw. 80th & 81st Sts.), 212-650-4737; 8:30 & 10:30, $25-$35 [repeats Thurs.-Sat.].
"Something Old, Something New" Israeli entertainer Dudu Fisher performs traditional Jewish standards & Broadway favorites at the Mazer Theatre, 197 E. B'way (Jefferson St.), 212-239-6200; 2 & 8, $45-$60 [repeats Thurs.-Sat. & Mon. at 8, Sun. at 2 & 7, through 12/8].
"Sweet Dreams" Linda Hallman w/David Lewis on piano tells all through repertoire feat. John Bucchino & Christine Lavin; Judy's Chelsea, 169 8th Ave. (betw. 18th & 19th Sts.), 212-929-5410; 8:30, $12 & $12 min.
Paula West performs jazz standards w/the Eric Reed Trio at the Oak Room, Algonquin Hotel, 59 W. 44th St. (betw. 5th & 6th Aves.), 212-840-6800; 9, $50 & $15-$50 min. [repeats Thurs. at 9, Fri. 9 & 11:30].
Comedy
Steve Byrne Stand-up w/Greg Rogell, Justin McKinney, Paul Mercurio, Steve Marshall & Nancy Redman; Dangerfield's, 1118 1st Ave. (betw. 61st & 62nd Sts.), 212-593-1650; 8:45 to closing, $12.50-$20 [repeats Thurs. & Sun. 8:45 to closing, Fri. at 8:30 & 10:30, Sat. at 8, 10:30 & 12:30 a.m.].
Colin Quinn Stand-up w/Greer Barnes, Lisa Lampanelli, Godfrey & Kevin Brennan; Comedy Cellar, 117 MacDougal St. (betw. Bleecker & W. 3rd Sts.), 212-254-3480; 9 & 11, $10-$15 & 2 drink min. [repeats Thurs. & Sun. at 9 & 11, Fri. at 9, 10:45 & 12:30 a.m., Sat. at 7:30, 9:15, 11 & 12:45 a.m.].
Reverend Jen's Anti-Slam Rev. Jen hosts open mic where comedians, sketch comics, musicians & freaks do their thang for six minutes; Collective Unconscious, 145 Ludlow St. (betw. Stanton & Rivington Sts.), 212-254-5277; 7:45 sign-up, $3.
Dance
BAM's 20th "Next Wave Festival" facilitates the U.S. premiere of Korper by Sasha Waltz; BAM Opera House, 30 Lafayette Ave. (Ashland Pl.), Ft. Greene, 718-636-4100; 7:30, $25-$45 [repeats Fri. & Sat.].
Dance Rink pres. "Seductions of the Desert" (adapted from a Tim O'Brien short story) & "On His Deathbed, Holding Your Hand" (based on the play by David Foster Wallace) at American Theater of Actors, 314 W. 54th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-620-7474; 8, $15 [through Sat.].
THURSDAY 11/14
Cabaret
"Blue Properties" Joseph P. McDonnell directs Michael Edwin Stuart & Heather Olt w/Wesley A. Chick at Duplex, 61 Christopher St. (7th Ave.), RSVP 212-255-5438; 7, $8 & 2 drink min.
"Fresh as a Daisy" Carol Shedlin's in full bloom w/Jon Delfin on piano & Frank Wagner on bass; Judy's Chelsea, 169 8th Ave. (betw. 18th & 19th Sts.), 212-929-5410; 8:30, $12 min.
"Magical Madness" Albert Cadabra, Adam Cardone & George Gorlick pres. ancient torture rituals, mind reading, voice throwing & "the blood & flames of hell" during vaudevillian magic show at Tagine, 537 9th Ave. (40th St.), 212-564-7292; 9, $10 & 2 drink min.
"Songs to Offend Almost Everyone" Sharon McKnight dishes it out w/Ian Herman on piano; Judy's Chelsea, 169 8th Ave. (betw. 18th & 19th Sts.), 212-929-5410; 10:30, $12 min. [repeats Fri. at 10:30, Sat. at 11].
Comedy
Open Auditions Think you're funny? Now's the time to prove it at open auditions for the ninth-annual U.S. Comedy Arts Festival in Aspen! Comedy Garden invites the first 100 performers in line each day to perform two-minutes of stand-up or three-minutes of sketch. Winners are invited back to perform at the Comedy Garden feat. host Greg Giraldo (Sat.); line begins at N. breezeway, Madison Square Garden, 2 Penn Plaza, 212-512-1786, www.hbocomedyfestival.com; 10 a.m., free.
Ralph Sketch comedy troupe, feat. Alison Becker, Jake Fleisher, Nick Kroll, Mark Malkoff & Brian Sacca, takes the shame out of laughing at others; Wings Theatre, 154 Christopher St. (Washington St.), 212-502-0318; 11, $5 [repeats Fri. at 11, Mon. & Tues. at 8].
Dance
"Dance-O-Matic" by Brian Brooks Moving Co. is a "techno-looking dance piece that could spring from a Gary Numan video, circa 1981"; Williamsburg Art Nexus, WAX, 205 N. 7th St. (betw. Driggs Ave. & Roebling St.), Williamsburg, 718-599-7997; 8, $15 [through Sun.].
Dance Theater Workshop declares a "Dancer's Night Out" feat. Kimberly Bartosik, Richard Siegal & Kathy Westwater; Bessie Schonberg Theater, 219 W. 19th St. (betw. 7th & 8th Aves.), 212-924-0077; 7, $22 [repeats Fri. & Sat. at 7, Sun. at 2].
Guta Hedewig choreographs Stabat Mater/Mother Stood at Danspace Project at St. Mark's Church, 131 E. 10th St. (2nd Ave.), 212-674-8194; 8:30, $12 [through Sun.].
FRIDAY 11/15
Cabaret
"American Songbook" Popular cabaret series continues w/NPR personality Robert Kapilow answering the question, "What Makes Leonard Bernstein Great?" feat. vocals by tenor Brian d'Arcy James; Stanley H. Kaplan Penthouse, Lincoln Center, Rose Bldg., 165 W. 65th St., 10th fl. (betw. Amsterdam Ave. & B'way), 212-721-6500; 8, $25.
"Seeks Out the Tunes" Anthony Santelmo Jr. w/Nan Butcher on piano; Judy's Chelsea, 169 8th Ave. (betw. 18th & 19th Sts.), 212-929-5410; 8:30, $12 min.
"S'Wonderful!-A Gershwin Review" APAC transforms into a cozy cafe & pres. the beloved music of Ira & George Gershwin; Astoria Performing Arts Center, 31-30 33rd St. (betw. 31st Ave. & B'way), Astoria, RSVP 718-278-5925; 8, $15, $12 st./s.c., $5 child. 16 & under [repeats Sat. at 8, Sun. at 6].
Comedy
The Adventures of Lover-Tron Horse Trade Theater Group & the Bad Astronauts pres. saucy sketch comedy at the Red Room, 85 E. 4th St., 3rd fl. (betw. 2nd & 3rd Aves.), 212-206-1515; 10:30, $12, $8 st./s.c. [repeats Sat., through 12/15].
Behind the Musical Glue pres. "an edgy look at backstage life" through musical improv feat. backstabbing, betrayal, spiritual awakening & hopefully rehearsal; Gotham City Improv, 158 W. 23rd St., 2nd fl. (betw. 6th & 7th Aves.), 212-367-8222; 9, $7.
The Friday Night Freakathon Joe Dixon hosts stand-up for the tragically single freaks out there who'd be eating alone if they weren't all here together; back room at Gioia Restaurant, 387 6th Ave. (betw. Waverly Pl. & W. 8th St.), 212-255-7800; 8:30, free.
Minimum Wage Blue Code Ringo Burger Boy Productions lets you in on the thrilling secrets of the fast food industry incl. "the art of spatulary" & "the ins & outs of bathroom duty" musical-style; Downtown Variety Lounge, Present Company Theatorium, 198 Stanton St. (betw. Ridge & Attorney Sts.), 212-726-2095; 8:30, $12 [repeats Sat., through 12/14].
Russ Meneve Stand-up w/Susie Essman, Kevin Brennan, Kenny Williams & Bob DiBuono; Stand-Up New York, 236 W. 78th St. (B'way), 212-595-0850; 8, 10 & 12:15 a.m., $15 & 2 drink min.
Dance
Dance Forum-NY offers "Five Reasons Why" (uh, dancers can't count?)?pieces by Carol Fonda, Theresa Duhon & Isabel Gotzkowsy; 20 E. 17th St., 2nd fl. (betw. 5th & B'way Aves.), 212-633-7202; 8, $12 [through Sun.].
Improvisational Arts Ensemble in "Gone Today, Here Tomorrow" at Middle Collegiate Church, 50 E. 7th St. (betw. 1st & 2nd Aves.), 212-439-8185; 7:30, $15 [repeats Sat.].
Marymount Manhattan College Dance Repertoire pres. "Dancers at Work" in the Great Hall, 221 E. 71st St. (betw. 2nd & 3rd Aves.), 212-517-0539; call for times [through Sun.].
SATURDAY 11/16
Cabaret
"American Songbook" Popular cabaret series pres. Tony-nominated Broadway star La Chanze performing standards, jazz & original songs; Stanley H. Kaplan Penthouse, Lincoln Center, Rose Bldg., 165 W. 65th St., 10th fl. (betw. Amsterdam Ave. & B'way), 212-721-6500; 8 & 10, $30-$45.
"A Brand New Us" Judy Kreston & David Lahm start fresh w/Ratzo Harris on bass & Phil Leone on drums; Judy's Chelsea, 169 8th Ave. (betw. 18th & 19th Sts.), 212-929-5410; 8:30, $12 min.
Cary Hoffman performs Frank Sinatra's "most celebrated 50s classics" w/an 11-piece orchestra?& listen, this guy sounds exactly like Frank; Carnegie Club, 156 W. 56th St. (betw. 6th & 7th Aves.), 212-843-8073; 8 & 10, $30 & 2 drink min.
"Judy Garland & Liza Minelli Live!" Bigger & better than Liza's big-top wedding (and her yanked-off-the-air tv show, we presume), it's celebrity impersonators Tommy Femia & Christine Pedi doing the duo proud w/classic hits & some new tunes; Don't Tell Mama, 343 W. 46th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-757-0788; 11, $20 & 2 drink min. [through 11/30]
"La Vie En Rose" Elizabeth Hodes' trib. to the French chanteuse Edith Piaf, noted for emotional songs incl. "Mon Dieu" & "Les Amants D'un Jour"; Danny's Skylight Room, 346 W. 46th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-265-8133, 9:30, $15 & $10 min.
Va Va Voom Room Miss Astrid hosts night of burlesque, vaudeville, strippers, magicians & clowns for Fez/Time Cafe, 380 Lafayette St. (Great Jones St.), 212-330-9349; 10:30, $15 & 2 drink min.
Comedy
Brooklyn Brew-Ha-Ha Ritch Duncan emcees stand-up feat. Rena Zager, Karen Sneider, Jon Fisch, Liam McEneaney, Val Kappa, Vincent Durham, Dan Allen, Jane Campbell, Gilad Foss & Hank Flynn; the Boudoir Bar, East End Ensemble, 273 Smith St. (betw. Sackett & Degraw Sts.), Carroll Gardens, 718-624-8878; 9, $5 & 1 drink min.
If We Were Men, We'd Be Famous Bitter women incl. Shecky Beagleman, Darcy Casteleiro, Gilda Konrad, Suzanne O'Neill & Janet Rosen vent their frustrations; upstairs at Rose's Turn, 55 Grove St. (betw. 7th Ave. & Christopher St.), 212-366-5438; 8:45, $5 & 2 drink min.
Mail Order Family "Big Vagina Monologues" is no longer, due to copyright infringement & a letter from Eve Ensler, but never fear, Jackie Clarke now vents about life w/her gun-toting dad & mail-order crazed stepmom; Upright Citizens Brigade Theater, 161 W. 22nd St. (betw. 6th & 7th Aves.), 212-366-9176; 7:30, $7.
"No Name?And a Bag O' Chips" Eric J. Vetter & Dawn J. Owens pres. variety show feat. delightfully dumb door prizes, cheap eats, an after party & a free bag o' chips, or course; Common Basis Theatre, 750 8th Ave., 5th fl. (betw. 46th & 47th Sts.), 212-928-1950; 11:30, free.
Viva Variety Night! Michael & Bricken host a very variety 10:17 night feat. super sketches like "the Mike Birch Caucasian Experience" & acts incl. Singer & Saw, Andres du Bouchet & the Sullivan Comedia Players?plus comedians Amber Tozer & Joe Minnitte & free drinks for all!; Gershwin Hotel, 7 E. 27th St. (betw. 5th & Madison Aves.), 212-932-3767; 10, $5.
Dance
12th Series of Hatch New works by up-&-coming plus established artists/companies incl. Pat Catterson/9 Lives, Stephanie Tack, Theresa Duhon, Freespace Dance, Pascal Rekoert/MidGetDance & Johannes Wieland; Works Studio, 131 W. 24th St., 4th fl. (betw. 6th & 7th Aves.), 212-691-3803; 8, $8.
SUNDAY 11/17
Cabaret
Tsidii Le Loka Best known as The Lion King's Rafiki, Le Loka pres. unique versions of folk favorites from Bob Dylan & Miriam Makeba?plus original songs flavored w/jazz, blues & world music; Fez/Time Cafe, 380 Lafayette St. (Great Jones St.), 212-533-2680; 8, $15.
"Words for the Wise" Clark Warren shares life's lessons w/guest Linda Fields & Frank Underwood; Judy's Chelsea, 169 8th Ave. (betw. 18th & 19th Sts.), 212-929-5410; 5:30, $12 min.
Comedy
"O.C.Y.C.'s Ravenous Wombat" This windy city's sketch comedy troupe blows in w/skits full of things they love to hate; Rififi, 332 E. 11th St. (betw. 1st & 2nd Aves.), 212-677-1027; 8, $6.
Rabbit Carl Kelsch hosts featured comics & lets new talent show their stuff in comfy quarters; Revival, 129 E. 15th St. (betw. Irving Pl. & 3rd Ave.), 212-253-8061; 8, free.
The Squeaky Clean Comedy Show Jorjeana Marie & Kathy Searle host stand-up, improv & sketch comedy from Greg DeVivo, Sal Genna, Tonya Lester, Patty Melamed-Genna, Wende O'Reilly, Senad Ramovic, Tommy Savas, Douglad Taurel & Michael Whitney; HA! Comedy Club, 369 W. 46th St. (betw. 8th & 9th), 212-977-3884; 6:30, $10 & 2 drinks.
MONDAY 11/18
Cabaret
"An Evening" Kathleen Kaefer w/D. Jay Bradley on piano; Judy's Chelsea, 169 8th Ave. (betw. 18th & 19th Sts.), 212-929-5410; 8:30, $12 min.
Leer Mondays Ricky Ritzel & Aaron Morishita from the Lounge-O-Leers impress w/retro hits via synthesizer; Judy's Chelsea, 169 8th Ave. (betw. 18th & 19th Sts.), 212-929-5410; 10, $12 min.
Comedy
Greg Vacarello Stand-up w/Peter Bales, Jerry Diner, Greg Rogell, Sherrod Small & Richie Byrne; Dangerfield's, 1118 1st Ave. (betw. 61st & 62nd Sts.), 212-593-1650; 8:45 to closing, $12.50 [repeats Tues.].
Colin Quinn Stand-up w/Tom Papa, Robert Kelly, Godfrey & Jim Norton; Comedy Cellar, 117 MacDougal St. (betw. Bleecker & W. 3rd Sts.), 212-254-3480; 9 & 11, $10 & 2 drink min. [repeats Tues.].
TUESDAY 11/19
Cabaret
"Bein' Green: A Collection of Irish Songs" Colm Reilly touts the best of Ireland w/guest vocalist Kathleen Kaefer & D. Jay Bradley on piano; Judy's Chelsea, 169 8th Ave. (betw. 18th & 19th Sts.), 212-929-5410; 8:30, $15 & $12 min.
"So in Love: The Love Songs of Cole Porter" Andrea Marcovicci celebrates her 15th year at the Algonquin w/new show feat. Porter hits "Why Can't You Behave?" & "You Do Something to Me"; the Oak Room, Algonquin Hotel, 59 W. 44th St. (betw. 5th & 6th Aves.), 212-944-3109; 9, $15-$50 min.
Comedy
Lisa Lampanelli Still warm from roasting Chevy Chase, the Queen of Mean, sets her sights on you; Caroline's on Broadway, 1626 B'way (betw. 49th & 50th Sts.), 212-757-4100; 9:30, $17 & 2 drink min.
Dance
BAM's 20th "Next Wave Festival" pres. Japanese dance co. Sankai Juku's Hibiki; BAM Opera House, 30 Lafayette Ave. (Ashland Pl.), Ft. Greene, 718-636-4100; 7:30, $25-$50.
THEATER
Performance times follow the paper's publishing schedule. (Weds.-Tues.). Call theater for complete schedule.
IN PREVIEWS
Adult Entertainment Danny Aiello & Jeannie Berlin star in new Elaine May comedy about porn (uh?but Danny doesn't take his shirt off, right?) at Variety Arts Theatre, 110 3rd Ave. (betw. 13th & 14th Sts.), 212-239-6200; Sat. & Tues. at 8, mats. Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $25-65 [opens 12/2].
Bliss Debut of Ben Bettenbender's tale of love, revenge & murder between an ex-con/hitman, a woman & her husband; the Rattlestick Theater, 224 Waverly Pl. (betw. 11th & Perry Sts.), 212-206-1515; Weds.-Mon. at 8, $37.50 [opens 11/17, through 12/22].
Boston Marriage Karen Kohlhaas directs David Mamet comedy, feat. Kate Burton & Martha Plympton, exploring class, sexuality & love in 19th-century New England; Martinson Hall, Joseph Papp Public Theater, 425 Lafayette St. (Astor Pl.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, Sun. at 7, mats. Sat. & Sun. at 2, $45 [opens 11/20].
Crowns New "gospel musical" based on book Crowns: Portraits of Black Women in Church Hats at Second Stage Theater, 307 W. 43rd St. (8th Ave.), 212-246-4422; call for times & prices [opens 12/3, through 1/5].
Dance of the Vampires Michael Crawford stars as 19th-century vampire Count Von Krolock in musical adaptation of Roman Polanski's The Fearless Vampire Killers; Minskoff Theatre, 200 W. 45th St. (B'way), 212-307-4100; Weds.-Sat., Mon. & Tues. at 8, mats. Weds. & Sat. at 2, $25-$95 [opens 11/21].
The Golden Age In association w/Bindlestiff Family Variety Arts, Cagey Productions celebrates the lost artistry of vaudeville entertainment; Palace of Variety, 125 W. 42nd St. (betw. 6th & 7th Aves.), 877-BINDLES; Tues. at 7, $15, $7 child. [opens 11/26, through 12/17].
Harlem Duet Production offers an answer to "Who would Othello be if he were alive today?"; Blue Heron Arts Center, 123 E. 24th St. (betw. Park Ave. S. & Lexington Ave.), 212-206-1515; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, mat. Sun. at 3, $15 [opens 11/13, through 12/1].
A Last Dance for Sybil Ben Hammer (The Diary of Anne Frank) stars in new drama by Ossie Davis w/Ruby Dee; the Theatre at St. Clements, 423 W. 46th St. (betw. 9th & 10th Aves.), 212-279-4200; Weds.-Fri. at 7:30, Sat. at 8, mats. Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $20-$40 [opens 11/21, through 12/15].
Poor Beast in the Rain Playwright Billy Roche's followup to his Wexford Trilogy, about the actions a troublemaker takes upon returning home; Irish Arts Center, 553 W. 51st St. (betw. 10th & 11th Aves.), 212-206-1515; Weds. at 7, Thurs.-Sat. at 8, mat. Sun. at 3, $40-$45 [opens 11/13].
Prelude to a Kiss "Mystical ride of exchanged identities, hidden longings and the pure connection of souls"; Gloria Maddox Theater, 151 W. 26th St., 7th fl. (betw. 6th & 7th Aves.), 212-741-0265; Weds.-Sat. at 8, mat. Sun. at 3, $15 [opens 11/16, through 12/8].
Texarkana Waltz Western-themed Elizabethan tragedy set in Oklahoma in which a father murders his wife. How will their children, Houston & Dallas, react?; the Kirk Theater at Theatre Row Complex, 410 W. 42nd St. (betw. 9th & 10th Aves.), 212-279-4200; Weds.-Sat. at 8, $15 [opens 11/13, through 11/30].
Tuesdays with Morrie David Esbjornson directs Mitch Albom's touching autobiographical tale about learning the true meaning of life feat. Alvin Epstein as Morrie & Jon Tenney as Mitch; Minetta Lane Theater, 18 Minetta La. (6th Ave.), 212-307-4100; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, Sun. at 7, mats. Sat. & Sun. at 3, $45-$65 [opens 11/19].
JUST OPENED
Acts of Providence Alter Ego Theatre Co. pres. two one-acts by Edward Allen Baker incl. North of Providence feat. brother & sister's life-changing decision & world premiere of comedy Jane's Exchange; Sande Shurin Theatre, 311 W. 43rd St., 6th fl. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-206-1515; Thurs.-Sat. at 8, mat. Sun. at 3, $15 [through 11/17].
Amour Musical love story set in Paris during the 50s w/score by Michel Legrand; Music Box Theatre, 239 W. 45th St. (betw. B'way & 8th Ave.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, mats. Weds. & Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $60-$85.
As I Lay Dying New York debut of the staged adaptation of William Faulkner's portrait of America during the Great Depression; Chashama, 111 W. 42nd St. (betw. 6th & 7th Aves.), www.basementflat.org; Thurs.-Tues. at 7:30, $14, $12 adv. [through 11/26].
Betty Rules Musical tracks life of female-fronted rock band; Zipper Theater, 336 W. 37th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-239-6200; Weds., Thurs. & Tues. at 8, Fri. & Sat. at 7 & 10, Sun. at 5, $29.90-$44.90.
Between A and B: Scenes from Our Apartment Thanks to a 400-square-foot, sixth-floor walkup, newlywed comedians Jill Shely Fleming & Dan Fleming are closer than ever & want to share their coping methods w/you!; Red Room, 85 E. 4th St., 3rd fl. (betw. 2nd Ave. & Bowery), 212-206-1515; Weds. & Tues. at 8, $15, $10 adv. [through 11/20].
Blessing in Disguise Larry Pellegrini's musical comedy begins at the end of WWIII, "when it's every drag queen for herself"; the Times Square Theatre, 675 8th Ave. (betw. 42nd & 43rd Sts.), 212-206-1515; Weds.-Sat., Mon. & Tues. at 8, mat. Sat at 5, $55.
Blue Window Craig Lucas (Prelude to a Kiss, Reckless) has new play about dinner party?okay, okay! It's really about everything else; Juilliard Theater, 60 Lincoln Center Plaza, B'way (64th St.), 212-769-7406; call for times, free (tickets required) [through 11/18].
Bumping Umbrellas One-hour voyage into the lives of three strangers who, unlike you, aren't afraid to indulge; Don't Tell Mama, 343 W. 46th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-757-0788; Sun. at 8:30, $10 & 2 drink min. [through 11/17].
Burn This James Houghton directs Elisabeth Shue, Peter Sarsgaard, Ty Burrell & Dallas Roberts in a "turbulent and funny" play about four New Yorkers overcoming their "deepest fears and doubts" after an unexpected death; Union Sq. Theater, 100 E. 17th St. (Park Ave. S.), 212-307-4100; Tues. at 8, $30-$65.
Cinema The Joe Kelly Players perform theatrical meditations without cinema magic to "celebrate the great lies of film narrative"; St. Marks Theater, 94 St. Marks Pl. (betw. 1st Ave. & Ave. A), www.joekellyplayers.com; Fri. & Sat. at 10:30, $10 [through 11/16].
Clown Brain Amusing look at how Dick's "comic mind digests life and reinterprets it as comedy," staged by vaudevillian troupe the New York Goofs; the Flea Theater, 41 White St. (betw. Church St. & B'way), 212-206-1515; Thurs. & Fri. at 9:30, Sat. at 7 & 9:30, mat. Sun. at 2, $20 [through 11/17].
Columbia, the Germ of the Ocean Ian W. Hill directs Trav S.D.'s politically incorrect burlesque based on Columbus' voyage to the Americas feat. dialect humor, opera parody, slapstick & wordplay; Chasama Theatre, 135 W. 42nd St. (betw. 6th Ave. & B'way), 718-907-0819; Fri. at 8, $15 [through 12/6].
Curve Nicholas Devine plays five characters during evening of monologues; Pelican Theater, 750 8th Ave. (46th St.), 212-206-1515; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, $15 [through 11/23].
Debbie Does Dallas Cumming-of-age story based on film of same name feat. original music & new cheers?but the girls keep their clothes on?hilariously funny & slightly crude; Jane Street Theatre, 113 Jane St. (betw. Washington St. & 10th Ave.), 212-239-6200; Weds., Thurs., Mon. & Tues. at 8, Fri. at 8 & 10:30, Sat. at 7 & 10, $30-$45, $25 st.
Dracula Under the Table Ensemble Theatre pres. new adaptation of horrific Bram Stoker classic; Chasama Theatre, 135 W. 42nd St. (betw. 6th Ave. & B'way), 718-907-0819; call for times, $12, $10 st. [through 11/20].
The Exonerated Bob Balaban directs Jessica Blank & Erik Jensen's controversial drama based on interviews w/wrongly imprisoned death row inmates found innocent & freed; 45 Bleecker St. (Lafayette St.), 212-307-4100; Weds.-Fri. & Tues. at 8, Sat. at 5 & 9, Sun. at 3 & 7, $55.
Flower Drum Song Story based on novel by C.Y. Lee about Chinese woman who moves to San Francisco; Virginia Theater, 245 W. 52nd St. (betw. B'way & 8th Ave.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, mats. Weds. & Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $65-$95.
Four Dogs and a Bone Theatre Snap breathes life into John Patrick Shanely's comedic look at the movie industry feat. four dogs vying for a bite of the same bone; Pseudo, 600 B'way (Houston St.), 212-475-9525; Weds., Mon. & Tues. at 8, $15 [through 11/30].
Ghosts Amy Irving & David Patrick Kelly star in new translation of Ibsen drama at Classic Stage Co., 136 E. 13th St. (betw. 3rd & 4th Aves.), 212-677-4210; Weds.-Sun. & Tues. at 8, mat. Sun. at 3, $35-$50 [through 12/8].
Hairspray Musical based on John Waters' film about plump girl's attempts to racially integrate teen dance show; Neil Simon Theater, 250 W. 52nd St. (betw. B'way & 8th Ave.), 212-307-4100; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, mats. Weds. & Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $60-$100.
Hollywood Arms Moving comedy written by Carol Burnett & daughter Carrie Hamilton, based on Burnett's 1986 memoirs; Cort Theatre, 138 W. 48th St. (betw. 6th & 7th Aves.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, mats. Weds. & Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $20-$80.
In Spite of Myself Antoinette LaVecchia addresses mother-daughter relationships in her solo work-in-progress at Urban Stages, 259 W. 30th St. (betw. 7th & 8th Aves.), 212-206-1515; Sun. & Mon. at 8, $15, $10 st. [through 11/25].
Iphigenia in Tauris Whosa-hisa-whatsa? Dude, it's Euripides!; HERE, 145 6th Ave. (betw. Spring & Dominick Sts.), 212-647-0202, www.here.org; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8:30, mat. Sun. at 4, $15 [through 11/24].
Kallisti Screaming Venus pres. festival of six one-acts. Highlights incl. Rachael Hoeffel's The Pheasant, adapted from Raymond Carver's short story. Plus, Chance Muehleck's Our Father's House, directed by Melanie Armer; Clemente Soto Vélez Cultural Center, 107 Suffolk St. (betw. Rivington & Delancey Sts.), 212-358-3689; Weds.-Sat. at 8, $15 [through 11/16].
Like a Springsteen Song Exceptional love story interwoven w/songs by the Boss; Blue Heron Arts Center, 123 E. 24th St. (betw. Park Ave. S. & Lexington Ave.), 212-330-6554; Weds., Thurs. & Tues. at 8, $15 [through 11/21].
Little Ham Musical love story based on Langston Hughes play set during 1930's Harlem Renaissance; John Houseman Theater, 450 W. 42nd St. (betw. 9th & 10th Aves.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, mats. Weds. & Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $65.
Love, Janis Homage to the first lady of rock incorporates 19 of her songs & all of her hits; the Village Theater, 158 Bleecker St. (betw. Sullivan & Thompson Sts.), 212-307-4100; call for times, $45-$100.
Love Research Karen Sorensen's findings after asking 100 New Yorkers five questions about amore in exchange for a flower?now that's gay; Collective Unconscious, 145 Ludlow St. (betw. Stanton & Rivington Sts.), 212-696-6807; Thurs.-Sat. at 8, mat. Sun. at 2, $10 [through 11/17].
The Mailman Always Comes Twice Satire twist on classic film noir incorporates video footage & song; Chelsea Playhouse, 125 W. 22nd St. (betw. 6th & 7th Aves.), 212-358-3436; Weds., Thurs. & Sun. at 8, Fri. & Sat. at 8 & 10:30, $30-$35 [through 11/24].
Moscow Jessica Kubzansky directs as three gay men (Nic Arnzen, Alan Mingo, Jr. & Clay Storseth) trapped in a theater use a Chekhov play to maintain their sanity (bad plan), feat. musical adaptation of The Three Sisters. Part of fourth-annual Chekhov Now Festival; Connelly Theater, 220 E. 4th St. (betw. Aves. A & B), 212-414-7773; Fri. & Mon. at 8, Sat. at 5, $15 [through 11/22].
Or Polaroids (Version 2.1) Ken Urban's new work captures on film the violent horrors that trouble insomniacs while in the "safety" zone between waking & sleeping; HERE, 145 6th Ave. (betw. Spring & Dominick Sts.), 212-647-0202; Fri. & Sat. at 10:30, $15 [through 11/23].
Orpheus Descending Le Wilhelm & Love Creek Productions pres. "rarely seen" (yet extremely predictable) Tennessee Williams play (oh, I don't know, think lonely, sex-starved, possibly crazy older woman muddling through life in a thin slip & hot climate); Creative Place Theatre, 750 8th Ave. (46th St.), 212-769-7973; Thurs.-Sun. & Tues. at 8; $15.
The Overdevelopment of Scott Sci-fi musical comedy genetically alters seven human into test subjects to help facilitate studies w/cosmetics, violence, tv, sexual addiction, hygiene products, television & listening; NY Dance Center, 158 W. 26th St. (betw. 6th & 7th Aves.), 212-206-1515; Fri.-Sun. at 8, mat. Sun. at 3, $15, $12 st./s.c./child. [through 11/24].
Repertorio Español continues 35th-season w/best of Latin theatre incl. Carmen Rivera's Yerma & Gabriel Garcia Marquez's Cronica de Una Muerte Anunciada (Chronicle of a Death Foretold); Gramercy Arts Theater, 138 E. 27th St. (betw. Lexington & 3rd Aves.), 212-889-2850; call for times, $25-$40 [through 11/3].
Say Goodnight Gracie Frank Gorshin plays George Burns, taking you on a guided tour of the famed performer's life, incl. his unlikely marriage to Gracie Allen; Helen Hayes Theatre, 240 W. 44th St. (betw. 7th & 8th Aves.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, mats. Weds. & Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $65-$70.
The Shanghai Gesture Playwright Joanna Chan revisits John Colton's melodrama that hasn't been seen in NY for nearly 75 years?incl. scenes deleted from 1941 movie version; Bank St. Theater, 155 Bank St. (betw. West & Washington Sts.), 212-561-9635; Thurs.-Sat. at 8, mat. Sun. at 3, $15 [through 11/17].
She Stoops to Conquer or the Mistakes of a Night Oliver Goldsmith's satire of English class structure; Theater 80, 80 St. Marks Pl. (betw. 1st & 2nd Aves.), 212-598-9802; Thurs.-Sat. at 8, Tues. at 7, mats. Weds., Sat. & Sun. at 2, $30-$40 [through 11/23].
A Soldier's Death New drama by Tom O'Neil (Jack Kerouac: Last Call) documenting what title suggests; 13th St. Rep, 50 W. 13th St. (betw. 5th & 6th Aves.), 212-675-6677; Thurs.-Sat. at 7, $15, $10 st. [through 1/11].
Take Me Out chronicles the effects one ballplayer's sexual preference has on his team & fans; Joseph Papp Public Theater, 425 Lafayette St. (Astor Pl.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, Sun. at 7, mats. Sat. & Sun. at 2, $55 [through 11/24].
The Three Birds Sam Gold directs Joanna Laurens' passionate play based on lost Sophocles work, Tereus; Gale Gates, 37 Main St. (betw. Water & Front Sts.), Dumbo, 212-352-7085; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, $15 [through 11/23].
The Water Coolers Thomas Michael Allen's musical comedy laughs at corporate America & what it takes to get by there; Dillon's, 245 W. 54th St. (betw. B'way & 8th Ave.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Fri. & Tues. at 8, Sat. at 8 & 10:30, Sun. at 3 & 7, $65.
Who Killed Woody Allen? Celebrity satire fueled from award shows & murder mysteries; the Triad Theater, 158 W. 72nd St. (betw. Amsterdam & Columbus Aves.), 212-206-1515; Weds. & Thurs. at 9, $12 & 2 drink min. [through 12/5].
Woyzeck Nightmarish fable about boy who sells body for scientific experiment w/music & lyrics by Tom Waits & Kathleen Brennan; BAM's Harvey Theater, 651 Fulton St. (betw. Rockwell & Ashland Pl.), Ft. Greene, 718-636-4100; Weds.-Sat. at 7:30, $30-$80 [through 11/16].
Yentl Robert Kalfin directs this first-ever Yiddish-language adaptation of folktale about rabbi's daughter who dresses as a man to study at Yeshiva; 344 W. 36th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-213-2120; Weds. at 2 & 7, Thurs. & Tues. at 7, Sat. at 8, Sun. at 2 & 5:30, $45 [through 12/29].
Yo Soy Latina Linda Nieves-Powell's staged play is a powerful reaction to how the media portrays Latinas in America; Nuyorican Poet's Cafe, 236 E. 3rd St. (betw. Aves. B & C), 212-505-8183; Thurs.-Sat. at 7, $15 [through 11/30].