"COULD WE GET some drumming going "Could we get ...
Finley, however, is having a hard time finding women who'll scream in response to the planned recitation of the Bush administration's crimes. "We need screamers," Finley continually intones into the mic. She then figures that maybe the crowd's intimidated by the idea of performing. "They can be baby screams," she adds, which is a fairly questionable thing to say when abortion rights are part of the agenda.
A token drag queen is naturally allowed to join in the fun. There are a couple of guys in Capri pants who'd also probably do in a pinch. Between peaks in her pleading, Finley occasionally stops to grant an interview?as if this is some kind of event. It's more like an embarrassment worthy of a small college town. I'd leave, except that it seems like they need all the bodies they can muster.
By a very generous count, there are maybe 60 people gathered when the screaming finally starts?launching with the evergreen of "George Bush didn't win the election" and becoming more predictable from there. At least the small crowd is enthusiastic. Despite Finley's constant explanations about the event, it still takes a while before the crowd figures out that they're not all supposed to scream along.
People eventually get the point, though, as these poor oppressed protesters finally get to spend an hour sounding exactly like National Public Radio. Incidentally, the one leftist woman who tries departing from Finley's prepared text quickly has the mic taken away from her. Oh, well. Nobody said these women would be protesting in their own words.
After all this divisiveness?that is, between screamers and people with something better to do?it's nice to head up to the Apollo Theater for the 1st Hip-Hop Unity Concert. To the surprise of nobody, the headliner is the Roots?they're the ideal band for ensuring no front-row drive-bys. (De La Soul was presumably already booked for a birthday party in Connecticut.)
I'm certainly looking forward to a friendly evening of fun, positive rap, which seemingly kicks off with Tomorrowz Weaponz talking about how "The Lord made me a son-of-a-gun." That's rapping on the V-chip tip. It isn't until the end of their set that the trio notes that the only thing positive where they be is people with HIV.
Spaniard rapper El Meswy at least sounds positive, although most people in the audience can't figure out a thing he's saying. This leads to the funniest heckling of the evening, when one particularly long speech is met with a well-timed "What?" Meswy's also sporting the second Che Guevara shirt of the evening. I'm beginning to realize that maybe a guy like me may not be united with this particular love-fest. That's further hammered in when Kanye West takes the stage to announce, regarding the crack trade, that "the white man gets paid off of all that." Haven't these people seen 2 Fast 2 Furious?
Anyway, I stand up to take a bow, but nobody notices. Things then get calmer after the intermission, with Soulive and the Roots skipping speeches and settling into a nice jam-band vibe. This makes everybody feel nice and content and docile?as happily proven later outside by the schoolyard, with my declining crack sales nicely balanced by a 26 percent increase in ganja units moved.