Longtime Reader's Baseball Predictions; Bias Cuts; More Maxim Hype; More MUGGER Love; Just More...

The 2002 MLB season is nearly upon us and it is time for my prognostications and meditations upon the season and its outcome. This season will be remembered for a couple of reasons. A new pitch will be introduced into the game. It is called "The Ducklecurvler," or "The Duck" for short. It unlocks the secrets of perpetual motion and aerodynamic spatial relativism. George Bush will throw "The Duck" to Tom Daschle on Opening Day. It will take Daschle the rest of the season to figure out how to scratch his ass and wind his watch. The second reason this season will be remembered is a young outfielder with the Cincinnati Reds. His name is Adam Dunn. More on Adam in a bit.

In the American League the beloved Boston Red Sox will smite the mighty Yankees for the Eastern Division crown. New ownership, new management, the dumping of clubhouse cancer Carl Everett and a multitude of cosmic forces too obscure and metaphysical to break down here will be the catalyst that will enable the Red Sox to turn lead into gold. Who says the Yankees are too deep and the Sox too thin? Not me. The "Curse of the Bambino" will be broken, with or without several thousand buried cans of Campbell's Clam Chowder in MUGGER's backyard.

In the AL Central, I'm going with the "Pale Hosers" of Chicago. With Frank Thomas healthy, and lots of pitching, I think this team is better than Minnesota. I hate new Comiskey Park, but I gotta go with the White Sox.

In the AL West, my pick is Seattle. They won't win 116 games again this year, but they are the best in the West. My Wildcard team is the Oakland A's. Jason Giambi will be missed, but I think Art Howe is a great manager and will be the difference in getting his team into the playoffs.

Now for the National League... In the NL East my pick is the "Amazing Mets." All the experts are picking the Braves to repeat, but like Ted Turner, the Braves are getting senile. The Mets may just "hit" their way to the postseason.

The NL Central is the easily the strongest in MLB this year. This division is too close to pick. The form chart tells you that St. Louis and Chicago should be better than the Astros and the Reds. I predict that the Astros will win the division and that St. Louis and Chicago will beat each other senseless battling for the Wildcard spot. Adam Dunn of the Reds will astound everybody with the power display he will put on this year and by September everyone will have seen the next Mark McGwire/Barry Bonds/Babe Ruth/Hank Aaron. If the Reds had the squad to go with Dunn, everybody else would be playing for second. Adam Dunn is the real deal, all 6-feet-6 and 240 pounds. He could easily rewrite the record books in his tenure in the game. If you fancy yourself a real baseball person, go see this guy. You won't believe your eyes because he does things so easily, and remember, you read it here.

In the NL West the Arizona Diamondbacks will prevail and the Giants will finish second and out of the postseason. Bonds will have a good year but nothing close to what he did last year. The D'backs will be a very dangerous team in the postseason, and if Matt Williams can stay healthy, and Johnson and Schilling stay sharp, they may add another ring to the one they won last year.

Obviously, I am high on the real thing...popcorn, peanuts, hotdogs and beer. I like the Red Sox and the Astros in the World Series. If the Red Sox make it to the World Series the party will be at MUGGER's house; and if the Astros make it as well, the party will still be at MUGGER's house. My wife would have a fit if all of you drunks showed up at my house...

"Baseball is life, and all the rest is details..." and I still wish I had said it first. See ya at the yard, and remember, don't dig in if I'm on the bump.

Tracy Meadows, Brenham, TX

Maximum Hype

As a freelancer for Maxim, I'd agree to some extent with most of John Strausbaugh's contentions about Maxim being a marketing-driven vehicle ("Daily Billboard," 3/21), but I think he's mistaken in characterizing the latest "Greatest Cities on Earth" feature as a "boner" that "backfired." I claim no inside knowledge of the situation (I was not involved in this particular feature), but I think it's a safe assumption that Maxim's editors knew their ploy would be discovered?in fact they probably banked on the additional publicity it would generate. And so far, they've been right. In Detroit, the Free Press gave the story front-page coverage on both March 20 and 21, and it's been mentioned on several local newscasts. If that's a "boner," I think it's one that a lot of other glossies would be dying to repeat.

David Peisner, Atlanta

John Strausbaugh replies: Did they also plan to send the New-York-Is-Best issue to Philadelphia? Oops. Did they plan to have their senior editor mortify himself by getting caught lying to the press in at least five cities?and then lying again in his coy "explanation"? Sorry, I don't think so. And if they did it's even a slimier ploy. What I hear from inside Maxim is that at least some folks in editorial were very embarrassed, and the p.r. people were scrambling all the rest of the week to make lemonade out of this batch of lemons?no doubt hoping there's a lot more folks like Peisner out there. It's true, as I noted, that this gaffe won't hurt Maxim's extraordinary sales. But it makes them look like cynical screwups. And if they did that intentionally, that's just what they are.

Goldberg's a Snore

I read Celia Farber's interview with Bernard Goldberg ("Bias Attacks," 3/20), and there are a few thoughts that popped up in my mind. After almost 30 years, seven Emmys, a bestseller and a nice living, how was Bernard Goldberg screwed at CBS? Why is Barbara Walters at fault for interviewing Anne Heche, but Goldberg is a fearless journalist for his dodgeball expose on HBO's Real Sports? Does Goldberg think that the networks' evening newscasts' decline just started? They have been declining for years. John Stossel is not unpopular because he is a conservative. It's the Geraldo syndrome, "Hey, look at me!," that riles people. Maybe it's the Oprah syndrome, I'm not sure. At a time when our armed forces are at risk, it seems a little silly to hear about well-off middle-aged men complaining about how they were shafted by multinational corporations. How many people would have gladly traded places with Goldberg? Let's see, there is Fox News Channel, Rush, Sean, George Will, The Wall Street Journal, Imus, Stern and of course, New York Press. Conservative journalism is not marginal. Of course The New York Times has a political bias, just as every newspaper in the country does. It doesn't mean they are wrong. By the way, Goldberg is on the money about Koppel.

Sam Greenfield, Manhattan

Spread the Schmooze

MUGGER: Now that I have become more familiar with your rhetoric, it no longer puts me in a quandary. And, I appreciate your wit?as well as your point of view (with which I happen to concur).

I do not believe your son will flirt with The Nation when he matures (3/20)?but even if such fleeting experience emerges, it will prove to be an exercise of defiance, perhaps, only to drift by the wayside because he has been taught to think for himself. (Latin helps, as it enables one to comprehend words and phrases in English immediately and more efficiently.)

My one remaining "puzzlement": Why "MUGGER"?

Lastly, I want to take the opportunity to compliment your staff at New York Press for the courtesy and help they have given me?personally. They introduced me to Big Apple Parent as an effective advertising vehicle for my artwork.

This was a selfless gesture, and for which I am most appreciative. Happy Easter.

Nancy Joyce Jancourtz, Brooklyn

She's a Super-Freak

I just got through reading Meredith Broussard's "21 Things I Will Never Admit to Doing,"("First Person," 3/20) and I just gotta ask: Did all that shit really happen? Because if it did, you a freak, girl!

Craig D. Lindsey, Houston

Or a Boring Ho

RE: "21 Things I Will Never Admit to Doing": If you're going to write about being a slut, at least make it interesting.

Christopher Moses, Vancouver

Onward, Christian

RE Christian Viveros-Faune's review of the Whitney Biennial ("Art," 3/20). It is refreshing to know that there is an art critic out there who writes about reality, and, I believe, how a majority of young artists feel. I was at the opening of this year's Biennial and was also struggling to enjoy what I saw. As an artist, I have a vested interest in what is being done in the way of cutting-edge American contemporary art. However, if that is what I seek, I must look elsewhere (possibly my peers' studios). I read every review I could of the Biennial seeking the opinions of others in order to justify my dissatisfaction. What I found were reviews that carved a means to praise the show on a level that had little to do with the work in the show and the state of the arts, and, rather, much to do with keeping in the spirit of what a subdued public would like to hear. The Whitney is certainly not an alternative space with the freedom to showcase what it would like to, given the sources of much of its funding and support. That I understand. But do art critics have to uphold and support this stance in a way that glosses over the lack of vision, on the institution's part, and the lack of risk-taking, on the artists' part, which, in my opinion, is what contemporary art is based on? I know of two people who think not.