Listings - Theater In Previews THE "A" WORD Pregnant teen acts as vessel ...
THE "A" WORD
Pregnant teen acts as vessel for examining abortion in pre-Roe v. Wade; Greenwich St. Theater, 547 Greenwich St. (betw. Charlton & Vandam Sts.), 212-768-7971; Weds.-Sat. at 8, Sun. at 7, mat. Sun. at 3, $15 [opens 2/4, through 2/18].
BOY GETS GIRL
Heterosexual success story in the city; Manhattan Theater Club's Stage I, City Center, 131 W. 55th St. (betw. 6th & 7th Aves.), 212-581-1212; Tues. at 8, $55 [opens 2/20].
CELLINI
Florentine sculptor digs art & women during the Renaissance; Second Stage Theater, 307 W. 43rd St. (8th Ave.), 212-246-4422; call for times, $30-$50 [opens 2/12].
THE DEVIL'S MUSIC
Based on the "life & blues of Bessie Smith"; Theater 3, 311 W. 43rd St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-279-4200; Weds.-Sat. at 8, mats. Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $25-$35 [opens 2/1, through 3/3].
EXCUSE ME, I'M TALKING!
Sounds like every actor you ever met...this time it's just Annie Korzen's one-woman show; Duke Theater, 229 W. 42nd St. (betw. 7th & 8th Aves.), 212-239-6200; call for times, $40-$45 [opens 2/11].
FOOL FOR LOVE
Sam "sigh" Shepard's play about former lovers who rendezvous at a motel; 29th St. Rep, 212 W. 29th St. (betw. 7th & 8th Aves.), 212-465-1714; Weds.-Sat., Mon. & Tues. at 8, $35 [opens 2/14].
FORCE CONTINUUM
Three generations of African-American men serving as New York's finest; Atlantic Theater, 336 W. 20th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, mats. Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $35-$40 [opens 2/8].
FUNBOX TIMES SQUARE
Audience participatory "funhouse" is back; New Theater, 135 W. 42nd St. (betw. 6th Ave. & B'way), 212-269-4TIX; Fri. at 8, Sat. at 8 & 10:30, mat. Sun. at 3, $25 [opens 2/18].
THE PLAY ABOUT THE BABY
Edward Albee's latest about a young couple, an older couple & a baby, presumably; Century Center for the Performing Arts, 111 E. 15th St. (betw. Irving Pl. & Park Ave. S.), 212-239-6200; Tues.-Sat. at 8, Sun. at 7, mats. Sat. & Sun. at 3, $25-$55 [opens 2/1].
WORK=PAIN=SUCCESS
One-man commentary on the American work ethic & what it takes to be "successful"; Kraine Theater at KGB, 85 E. 4th St. (betw. 2nd Ave. & Bowery), 212-539-7686; Weds. at 8, $12-$15.
Just Opened
BARKING SHARKS
NYC premiere of Israel Horovitz's play about fisherman in small New England town; Gloria Maddox Theater, 151 W. 26th St., 7th fl. (betw. 6th & 7th Aves.), 212-741-0209; Weds.-Sat. at 8, mat. Sun. at 3, $15 contrib. [through 2/18].
BEAVER
Begins w/a mother's suicide & ends years later w/her daughter's wedding; Red Room Theater, 85 E. 4th St. (betw. 2nd Ave. & Bowery), 212-539-7686; Thurs.-Sat. at 8, mat. Sun. at 3, $12-$15 [through 2/4].
BRINGING IT ALL BACK HOME
Terrence McNally's examination of the American dream; Raw Space Theater, 529 W. 42nd St. (betw. 10th & 11th Aves.), 866-821-9100, ext.256; call for times, $12 [through 2/11].
BUYING TIME
Story of one law firm & its ethics; 14th St. Y Theater, 344 E. 14th St. (1st Ave.), 212-206-1515; call for times & prices [through 2/4].
CARY & GALLO: WHAT IF WE DID THIS?
Comedy duo blends sketches & film shorts; Soho Playhouse, 15 Vandam St. (betw. 6th Ave. & Varick St.), 212-239-6200; Sat. at 11, Mon. at 8, $30 [through 2/12].
THE CHANGELING
Engaged aristocrat falls in love w/traveling nobleman; Trilogy Theater, 341 W. 44th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-502-0887; Weds.-Sat. at 8, $15 [through 2/10].
CHEK-OUT? (AGAIN!)
Four modernized Chekhov comedies: "The Harmfulness of Tobacco," "The Bear," "The Proposal," & "The Celebration"; Producer's Club, 358 W. 44th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-462-9020; call for times & prices [through 2/4].
CHEKHOV ONE-ACTS
"The Anniversary" & "The Proposal"; Waterloo Bridge Theater, 203 W. 38th St., 5th fl. (7th Ave.), 212-316-0400; Thurs.-Sat. at 8, $10 [through 2/3].
THE CHERRY ORCHARD
Chekhov's most critically acclaimed tragedy; Theatre 80, 80 St. Mark's Pl. (betw. 1st & 2nd Aves.), 212-598-9802; call for times & prices [through 2/25].
CODE OF THE WEST
Marriage, money & betrayal in Victorian San Francisco; The Mint Theater, 311 W. 43rd St. (8th Ave.), 212-279-4200; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, mats. Sat. & Sun. at 3, $30 [through 2/11].
THE COMPLETE LOST WORKS OF SAMUEL BECKETT AS FOUND IN AN ENVELOPE (PARTIALLY BURNED) IN A DUSTBIN IN PARIS LABELED "NEVER TO BE PERFORMED. NEVER. EVER. EVER! OR I'LL SUE! I'LL SUE FROM THE GRAVE!"
Congratulations on reading the title; incl. his first puppet theater play, "Happy Happy Bunny Visits Sad Sad Owl" & his last, "Foot Falls Flatly," written posthumously; 196 Stanton St. (betw. Attorney & Ridge Sts.), 212-420-8877; Thurs.-Sat. at 8, $12 [through 2/3].
THE CONJURE MAN DIES
Said to be first mystery written by African-American author about king who moves to Harlem; Henry St. Settlement, 466 Grand St. (Pitt St.), 212-353-1176; Weds.-Fri. at 7:30, Sat. at 8, mats. Sat. & Sun. at 3, $25 [through 2/11].
CRYSTAL
Four youths conceal a girl's murder; Clemente Soto Vélez Cultural Center, 107 Suffolk St. (Rivington St.), 212-606-2310; Fri. & Sat. at 8, mat. Sun. at 4, $10-$15 [through 2/4].
DAY OF ABSENCE
Black actors in white face relay comic tale of a small Southern town; 645 Nicholas Ave. (141 St.), 212-539-8828; Fri. & Sat. at 8, Sun. at 3, $15, $12 st. & s.c. [through 2/25].
DIDO, QUEEN OF CARTHAGE
David Herskovits directs Christopher Marlowe play; RSVP 212-358-3657 for location; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, Sun. at 3 & 7, $15, $10 st. [through 2/24] .
THE FIRST JEWISH BOY IN THE KU KLUX KLAN
Lionel Kranitz's comedy about a young man who comes home from school & asks where mom keeps the old sheets; Homegrown Theater, 2628 B'way (betw. 99th & 100th Sts.), 646-349-4444; Fri., Sat. & Mon. at 8, $15 [through 3/5].
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Or "Lunch Hour Theater." Actors read one acts by Arthur Miller, Grace Paley & such; National Arts Club, 15 Gramercy Park S. (20th St.) 212-475-3424; call for times & prices [through 3/29].
GEMINI
Asylum inmate tries to take over the ward in this political commentary on fascism; 78th St. Theater Lab, 236 W. 78th St. (betw. B'way & Amsterdam Ave.), 212-873-9050; Weds.-Fri. at 8, Sat. at 8 & 10, $12-$15 [through 2/3].
HOPSCOTCH: THE NEW YORK SEX COMEDY
Isn't that in Cabal's bedroom? Oh well, apparently Wendy Williams' sex follies have a run too; Duplex, 61 Christopher St. (7th Ave.), 212-841-5410; Thurs. at 10, $5 & 2 drink min. [through 2/15].
HYMN TO THE RISING SUN
Black & white convicts spend 4th of July in this one act; La MaMa E.T.C., 74A E. 4th St. (betw. 2nd Ave. & Bowery), 212-475-7710; call for times & prices [through 2/18].
AN IDIOT DIVINE
Musical about two misfits, a murderer & a dullard, making their way through this world; 45 Bleecker, 45 Bleecker St. (Lafayette St.), 212-307-4100; Weds.-Fri. at 8, Sat. at 5 & 9, Sun. at 4, $25-$45 [through 2/18].
INDIGO RAT
Cabaret-style musical set in Berlin betw. the wars; Rose's Turn, 55 Grove St. (7th Ave. S.), 212-366-5438; Mon. at 7, $15 & 2 drink min. [through 3/26]
ISN'T IT ROMANTIC
Wendy Wasserstein's 1983 comedy about young feminists; Tribeca Playhouse, 111 Reade St. (betw. W. B'way & Hudson St.), 212-206-1515; call for times & prices [through 2/14].
JULIUS CAESAR
Caesar goes Mafia in this Shakespeare adaptation; 351 E. 74th St. (1st Ave.), 212-330-8866; Weds-Sat. at 8, $15 [through 2/17].
KILLERS & OTHER FAMILY
Lucy Thurber's play explores one woman's dangerous past; The Rattlestick Theater, 224 Waverly Pl. (betw. 11th & Perry Sts.), 212-206-1515; Weds.-Sat. at 8, Sun. at 7, $35 [through 2/18].
THE LAST MENAGERIE
Play about what would happen if The Glass Menagerie's Tom Wingfield came home; Here, 145 6th Ave. (betw. Spring & Dominick Sts.), 212-647-0202 or www.here.org; call for times, $15 [through 2/11].
THE MAN WHO SHOT HIS WASHING MACHINE
Small town murders, petty social agendas & Rottweilers; Theater for a New City, 155 1st Ave. (10th St.), 212-254-1109; Thurs.-Sat. at 8, mat. Sun. at 3, $10 [through 2/18].
MEDAL OF HONOR RAG
Therapy session between young Jewish shrink & black Vietnam vet; Blue Heron Arts Center, 121 E. 24th St. (betw. Park Ave. S. & Lexington Ave.), 212-332-0027; Thurs.-Sat. & Mon. at 8, mat. Sun. at 3, $19 [through 2/18].
THE MOON OF THE CARIBBEES
Eugene O'Neill's story of native beauties, drunken sailors & a full moon; the Flea, 41 White St. (betw. Church St. & B'way), 212-226-0051; Thurs.-Sat. at 10, $15 [through 2/24].
MORE LIES ABOUT JERZY
Authenticity of famous novelist's Holocaust memoir is questioned; Vineyard Theater, 108 E. 15th St. (Irving Pl.), 212-353-0303; Weds.-Sat. at 8, mats. Sun. at 3 & 7, $45 [through 2/11].
MULTIPLE ME
Cabaret ventriloquist has more than one personality; New 42nd St. Theater, 229 W. 42nd St. (betw. 7th & 8th Aves.), 212-281-1053; call for times, $15 [through 3/4].
MY MOTHER'S A BABY BOY
Three tales of love in a modern world?platonic, paternal & romantic; Kraine Theater at KGB, 85 E. 4th St. (betw. 2nd Ave. & Bowery), 212-206-1515; Thurs.-Sat. at 8, $15 [through 2/3].
THE NEGATIVE ENERGY FIELD & CAN'T GET STARTED
Isn't that in Cabal's bedroom? Two plays by Tom X. Chao run on alternate Saturdays; St. Mark's Theater, 94 St. Mark's Pl. (betw. 1st Ave. A), 212-539-7686; Sat. at 10:30, $15, $12 st. & s.c. [through 3/3].
NIGHT & DAY
Journalists fight to break a story about emerging African nation; Bouwerie Lane Theater, 330 Bowery (Bond St.), 212-677-0060; call for times, $40, $24 s.c., $20 st. [through 3/22].
NOW THAT COMMUNISM IS DEAD, MY LIFE FEELS EMPTY
Two hipsters explore a "pungent Foremanesque landscape"; Ontological at St. Marks Theater, 131 E. 10th St. (2nd Ave.), 212-533-4650; Thurs.-Sun. & Tues. at 8, $15.
ON PARADE
Three short exercises in not-so-traditional Japanese theater; Raw Space Theater, 529 W. 42nd St. (betw. 10th & 11th Aves.), 212-252-3476; Thurs.-Sat. at 8, Sun. at 7, mats. Sat. & Sun. at 3, free [through 2/4].
ONLY HEAVEN
A "musical celebration of Langston Hughes' poetry"; Connelly Theater, 220 E. 4th St. (betw. Aves. A & B), 212-206-1515; Weds.-Sat. at 8, mats. Sat. & Sun. at 3, $40 [through 2/4].
PARADISE ISLAND
No Tom Hanks, no midget & no couples looking for endorsement deals; a single mother & her daughter nearly lose it all on a gambling trip to the Bahamas; Playhouse at St. Clement's, 423 W. 46th St. (betw. 9th & 10th Aves.), 212-279-4200; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, mats. Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $25-$35 [through 2/25].
PARALLEL LIVES BASED ON THE KATHY & MO SHOW
One comedy, two women, 12 characters & you, baby; Duplex, 61 Christopher St. (7th Ave.), 212-255-5438; Sat. at 8, $10 & 2 drink min. [through 2/24].
PHAEDRE
Jean Racine's tale of war, gods, heroes & love; Pantheon Theater, 303 W. 42nd St., 2nd fl. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-560-2241; call for times, $15, $13 st. & s.c. [through 2/17]
PIRATES OF PENZANCE
Gender-bending cabaret version of Gilbert & Sullivan's musical; Pegasus Cabaret Theater, 119 E. 60th St. (betw. Park & Lexington Aves.), 212-539-3950; Fri. & Sat. at 8, $12 & two-drink min.
RESIDENT ALIEN
Life & work of Quentin Crisp as portrayed by Bette Bourne; New York Theater Workshop, 79 E. 4th St. (betw. 2nd Ave. & Bowery), 212-460-5475; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, Sun. at 7, mats. Sat. at 3, Sun. at 2, $10-$45 [through 2/25].
REPERTORIO ESPAñOL
Thirty third season of Latin American, Spanish & Hispanic-American theater, w/both new & repertory works performed; Repertorio Español, 138 E. 27th St. (betw. Lexington & 3rd Aves.), 212-889-2850 or www.repertorio.org; call for times, $30-$40 [through 2/26].
SALLY KELLERMAN...MORE THAN YOU KNOW
M*A*S*H''s Hot Lips does a medley & tells some jokes; Feinstein's at the Regency, 540 Park Ave. (61st St.), 212-339-4095; call for times & prices [through 2/8].
THE SEARCH FOR SIGNS OF INTELLIGENT LIFE IN THE UNIVERSE
Lily Tomlin gives Tony award winning performance in cast of characters & Jane Wagner directs; Booth Theater, 222 W. 45th St. (betw. B'way & 8th Ave.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, mats. Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $50-$65 [through 2/25].
SHAKESPEARE'S VILLAINS: A MASTERCLASS IN EVIL
Steven Berkoff's one-man show chronicling the Bard's many bad guys, returns to Joseph Papp Public Theater, 425 Lafayette St. (Astor Pl.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, mat. Sun. at 2, $35 [through 2/11].
SICILIAN LIMES & THE VICE
Two Luigi Pirandello plays about trials of marriage & monogamy; St. Mark's Theater, 94 St. Marks Pl. (betw. 1st Ave. & Ave. A), Kobun@httheater.org; Thurs.-Sat. at 8, $5. [through 2/10].
SKETCHING UTOPIA
Based on Upton Sinclair's 1906 New Jersey commune; Theater for a New City, 155 1st Ave. (10th St.), 212-254-1109; Thurs.-Sat. at 8, mat. Sun. at 3, $10 [through 2/18].
SOME OF MY PARTS
Female party addict realizes what the French knew all along?we are born & we die alone; Duplex, 61 Christopher St. (7th Ave.), 212-255-5438; Weds. at 7, $12 & 2 drink min. [through 1/31].
SOMEWHERE IN BETWEEN
Comedy about Jasper & Holly, two lovers in their late 20s; Looking Glass Theater, 422 W. 57th St. (betw. 9th & 10th Aves.), 212-279-4200; Weds.-Sun. at 8, $15, $12 st. [through 2/24].
SPOOKY DOG & THE TEENAGE GANG MYSTERIES
Scooby Doo parody, just in case you don't see enough of him on the Cartoon Network, which owns the rights to all of Hanna Barbera but refuses to show anything else; Kraine Theater, 85 E. 4th St. (betw. 2nd Ave. & Bowery), 212-539-7686; Fri. & Sat. at 10:30, $15 [through 2/24].
STICK AROUND
Carol Woods sings "Come Rain Or Come Shine," "Children Will Listen," "Even God Gets the Blues," & more; Arci's Place, 450 Park Ave. S. (betw. 30th & 31st Sts.), 212-532-4370; Weds., Thurs. & Tues. at 9, Fri. & Sat. at 8:30 & 11, call for prices [through 2/24].
STORY OF RATS
Play based on the writings of Georges Bataille; Chashama, 111 E. 42nd St. (betw. Park Ave. S & Lexington Ave.), 212-780-3372; Weds.-Sat. at 8, $10-$15 [through 2/3].
SUMMERLAND
A young man & his mother reveal dark secrets amidst the sweltering heat; Wings Theater, 154 Christopher St. (betw. Greenwich & Washington Sts.), 212-627-2961; Thurs. & Fri. at 8, Sat. at 7 & 10, $19 [through 2/3].
TAMICANFLY
Blind man & teenage grandfather bet the farm on long-shot horse; McGinn/Cazale Theater, 2162 B'way (75th St.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, mats. Sat. & Sun. at 3, $35 [through 2/25].
THEATER OF LIGHT
Painting, music & movement by Rudi Stern; 107 Suffolk St. (Delancey St.), 212-279-4200; call for times, $20.
THREE SECONDS IN THE KEY
A mother & son use the Knicks as a diversion from Hodgkins disease; P.S. 122, 150 1st Ave. (9th St.), 212-477-5288; Thurs.-Sun. at 7:30, $15 [through 2/25].
TIME & AGAIN
New musical based on Jack Finney's book; City Center, 131 W. 55th St. (betw. 6th & 7th Aves.), 212-581-1212; Weds.-Sun. & Tues. at 7:30, mats. Sat. & Sun. at 3, $40 [through 2/18].
VOICES FROM THE HOLY & NOT SO HOLY LAND
Steven Greenstein's one-man show about Israel & the Jewish Diaspora; Red Room Theater, 85 E. 4th St. (betw. 2nd Ave. & Bowery), 212-539-7686; Sun. at 8, $15, $12 st. & s.c. [through 2/25].
Continuing
COBB
Lee Blessing's look at cleat-bearing Hall-of-Famer Ty Cobb, returns for Off-Broadway run at Lucille Lortel Theater, 121 Christopher St. (betw. Hudson & Bleecker Sts.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, Sun. at 7, mats. Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $45, $17.50 st.
DE LA GUARDA
Argentine theater group infuses theater w/rock, dance, aerial contortionism & carnival elements in long-running smash Villa Villa; Daryl Roth Theater, 20 Union Sq. East (15th St.), 212-239-6200; call for times, $20-$45.
DINNER PARTY
Six people address aspects of marriage & divorce as they indulge in a fancy meal; Music Box Theater, 239 W. 45th St. (betw. 7th & 8th Aves.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, mats. Weds. & Sat. at 2, Fri. & Sun. at 3, $45-$70.
DIRTY BLONDE
Claudia Shear's production about "a gal, a guy & Mae West," starring Kathy Najimy, Kevin Chamberlin & Bob Stillman, moves to Broadway's Helen Hayes Theater, 240 W. 44th St. (betw. B'way & 8th Ave.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, mats. Weds. & Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $65.
END OF THE WORLD PARTY
Chuck Ranberg's new comedy about several men who share a house on Fire Island, starring Jim J. Bullock of Hollywood Squares fame; 47th St. Theater, 304 W. 47th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-239-6200; call for times, $45-$49.50.
FORBIDDEN BROADWAY 2001: A SPOOF ODYSSEY
Parody of Broadway musicals; Stardust Theater, Ellen's Stardust Restaurant, 1650 B'way (51st St.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat. & Mon. at 8:15, Sun. at 7:30, mats. Sat. at 2:30, Sun. at 3:30, $49.50.
4 GUYS NAMED JOSE & UNA MUJER NAMED MARIA
Song & dance routine about four men who have a dream?to stage a show of Latin standards; the Blue Angel Theater, 323 W. 44th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-239-6240; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, Sun. at 7:30, mats. Sat. & Sun. at 3, $37.50-$47.50.
FULLY COMMITTED
Becky Mode's humorous look inside one of Manhattan's trendiest restaurants opens Off-Broadway starring Christopher Fitzgerald; Cherry Lane Theater, 38 Commerce St. (Bleecker St.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Fri. & Tues. at 8, Sat. at 6 & 9, Sun. at 7, mat. Sun. at 3, $45.
I LOVE YOU, YOU'RE PERFECT, NOW CHANGE!
Musical revue looks at "Hopeful Heterosexuals"; Westside Theater, 407 W. 43rd St. (9th Ave.), 212-239-6200; Thurs.-Sat., Mon. & Tues. at 8, Sun. at 7:30, mats. Sat. at 2:30, Sun. at 3, $49.50-$55.
JANE EYRE
Musical adaptation of Charlotte Bronte's novel, which addresses love & temptation when an orphaned girl falls for her master; Brooks Atkinson Theater, 256 W. 47th St. (betw. B'way & 8th Ave.), 212-307-4100; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 7, mats. Weds. & Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $50-$86.
LATE NITE CATECHISM
Interactive comedy written by Vicki Quade & Maripat Donovan; St. Luke's Church, 308 W. 46th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-239-6200; Fri. & Sat. at 8, mats. Sat. & Sun. at 3, $40.
LINE
Play by Israel Horovitz now in its 26th year; Thirteenth St. Rep, 50 W. 13th St. (betw. 5th & 6th Aves.), 212-675-6677; Weds. & Thurs. at 7, Fri. & Sat. at 9:30, $12.50, $8 st./s.c.
LIVING IN THE WIND
One-man show dubs itself, comedic work in progress; Westbeth Theater Center, 151 Bank St. (betw. West & Washington Sts.), 212-741-0391; Tues. at 8:30, $10.
MAYBE BABY, IT'S YOU
Bachelor #542 please step forward?romantic comedy about finding the man of your dreams returns; St. Luke's Church, 308 W. 46th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), 212-239-6200; Thurs. & Fri. at 8, Sat. at 10, mat. Weds. at 2, $40.
THE MUSIC MAN
Meredith Wilson's adaptation of 1950 Broadway musical w/choreography by Susan Stroman; Neil Simon Theater, 250 W. 52nd St. (betw. B'way & 8th Ave.), 212-307-4100; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, mats. Weds. & Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $40-$85.
NAKED BOYS SINGING
The millennium of the woman (& gay guys) is officially underway as musical revue feat. eight naked men & 16 tunes; The Actors' Playhouse, 100 7th Ave. S. (betw. Grove & Bleecker Sts.), 212-463-0060; Weds.-Fri. & Mon. at 8, Sat. at 7 & 10, Sun. at 3 & 8, $35-$65.
OUR SINATRA
Celebration of this guy from Hoboken who could beat your ass with a cane; Dillion's, 245 W. 54th St. (betw. B'way & 8th Ave.), 212-239-6200; Weds., Fri., Sat., Mon. & Tues. at 8, Sun. at 7:30, mats. Weds. at 2:30, Sun. at 3, $50-$80.
PETE 'N' KEELY
Musical comedy looks back at 60s sitcom about "America's Swingin' Sweethearts" Pete & Keely, now divorced like the rest of us; John Houseman Theater, 450 W. 42nd St. (betw. 9th & 10th Aves.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, mats. Weds. & Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $35-$55.
PROOF
Manhattan Theater Club's B'way play about a young woman facing the complexities of love; Walter Kerr Theater, 219 W. 48th St. (betw. B'way & 8th Ave.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, mats. Weds. & Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $24-$69.
ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW
Rock 'n' roll cult favorite returns to B'way, so get ready to do the "Time Warp" again, starring a bald Joan Jett!; Circle in the Square Theater, 1633 B'way (50th St.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Fri. & Tues. at 8, Sat. at 5 & 9:45, Sun. at 2 & 7, $30-$79.50 [through 2/25].
STRICTLY PERSONAL
DJM ISO SF; turn a few pages ahead if you need a translation; Soho Playhouse, 15 Vandam St. (betw. 6th Ave. & Varick St.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, mats. Weds. & Sat. at 2:30, Sun. at 3, $45.
SWING
Musical & dance celebration feat. vocalist Ann Hampton Callaway; St. James Theater, 246 W. 44th St. (betw. B'way & 8th Ave.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, mats. Weds. & Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $20-$85.
THE SYRINGA TREE
Playwright & actress Pamela Gien takes on role of 28 characters as she tells tale of two families, one white, one black & their struggles in South Africa; Playhouse 91, 316 E. 91st St. (betw. 1st & 2nd Aves.), 212-307-4100; Weds-Sat., Mon. & Tues. at 8, mats. Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $47.50.
THE VAGINA MONOLOGUES
Eve Ensler's documentation of life as seen through the cooter, based on real-life interviews?new actresses every two weeks; Westside Theater, 407 W. 43rd St. (betw. 9th & 10th Aves.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Fri. & Tues. at 8, Sat. at 5 & 8, Sun. at 3 & 7:30, $55.
Long Runs
AIDA
Triangular love story w/music by Elton "amyl nitrate" John & lyrics by Tim Rice; Palace Theater, 1554 B'way (47th St.), 212-307-4747; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, mats. Weds. & Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $25-$80.
ANNIE GET YOUR GUN
Annie, played by Reba McEntire, returns to the Marquis Theater, 1535 B'way (46th St.), 212-307-4100; call for times, $85. s
CABARET
The Roundabout Theater's production of Kander & Ebb's classic; Studio 54, 254 W. 54th St. (betw. B'way & 7th Ave.), 212-239-6200, Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, Sun. at 7, mats. Sat. & Sun. at 2, $40-$90.
CHICAGO
Concert version of 1975 musical starring Bebe Neuwirth, Charlotte d'Amboise, Marcia Lewis, P.J. Benjamin & Brent Barrett; Shubert Theater, 225 W. 44th St. (betw. B'way & 8th Ave.), 212-239-6200 or www.chicagothemusical.com; Thurs.-Sat., Mon. & Tues. at 8, Sun. at 7, mats. Sat. & Sun. at 2, $37.50-$85.
THE DONKEY SHOW
"A Midsummer Night's disco" at El Flamingo, 547 W. 21st St. (betw. 10th & 11th Aves.), 212-307-4100 or www.thedonkeyshow.com; Weds. & Thurs. at 8, Fri. & Sat. at 8 & 10:30, $35-$39.
THE FANTASTICKS
Longest-running musical; Sullivan St. Theater, 181 Sullivan St. (betw. Bleecker & Houston Sts.), 212-674-3838; Weds.-Fri. & Tues. at 8, Sat. at 3 & 7, Sun. at 3 & 7:30, $36.50-$39.
FOSSE
Musical celebration of choreographer's oeuvre starring Ben Vereen; Broadhurst Theater, 235 W. 44th St. (betw. B'way & 8th Ave.), 212-239-6200; Thurs.-Sat., Mon. & Tues. at 8, Sun. at 7, mats. Sat. & Sun. at 2, $35-$85.
JEKYLL & HYDE
Musical by Frank Wildhorn & Leslie Bricusse starring everyone's favorite Baywatch man David Hasselhoff?not sure he's going to top Sebastian Bach. Maybe it's time to get Axl on the scene; Plymouth Theater, 236 W. 45th St. (betw. B'way & 8th Ave.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat. & Tues. at 8, mats. Weds. & Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $55-$80.
LES MISERABLES
Imperial Theater, 249 W. 45th St. (betw. B'way & 8th Ave.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat., Mon. & Tues. at 8, mats. Weds. & Sat. at 2, $20-$85.
THE LION KING
New Amsterdam Theater, 214 W. 42nd St. (B'way), 212-307-4100; Weds.-Sat. at 8, Sun. at 1 & 6:30, mats. Weds. & Sat. at 2, $25-$90.
PERFECT CRIME
Long-running murder mystery; Duffy Theater, 1553 B'way (46th St.), 212-695-3401; Thurs.-Sat. & Mon. at 8, Sun. at 7, mats. Weds. & Sat. at 2, Sun. at 3, $35.
PHANTOM OF THE OPERA
Majestic Theater, 247 W. 44th St. (betw. B'way & 8th Ave.), 212-239-6200; Weds.-Sat., Mon. & Tues. at 8, mats. Weds. & Sat. at 2, $20-$80.
RENT
An East Village La Boheme; Nederlander Theater, 208 W. 41st St. (betw. 7th & 8th Aves.), 212-307-4100; call for times, $20-$80.
TONY & TINA'S WEDDING
Interactive musical theater now in its 12th year of production; St. Luke's Church, 308 W. 46th St. (betw. 8th & 9th Aves.), reception at Vinnie Black's Vegas Room, Hotel Edison, 221 W. 46th St. (betw. B'way & 8th Ave.), 212-239-6200; Thurs.-Sun. at 7, mat. Sun. at 2, $67.50-$80.