CRAMPIN' THE STYLE How cool can something get before it ...

STYLE How cool can something get before it comes back around to square? The Chesterfield Kings have been providing the musical answer since the mid-90s. They've had the occasional lucid moment, but the Chesterfields seem ludicrous opening for the Cramps at Irving Plaza. It can't be easy when a band's aping a genre that they've outlived three times over. Still, you'd think they'd notice when they start to sound and look just like the members of Poison.

Poison, however, was a better pop band. The Chesterfield Kings are busy trying to mine a rock pose, which consists mainly of lead singer Greg Prevost climbing the amps as if Iggy Pop had left little Arthur Murray dance steps for him to follow. The Chesterfields also plug Trash and Vaudeville as their favorite NYC clothing store. It's a good thing that Prevost isn't alive to see this.

The low point is when the Chesterfields perform "I'm Five Years Ahead of my Time." I was hoping the Cramps would do that one. Their take on the Third Bardo's classic is a highlight of the two-disc How to Make a Monster, which assembles some great lost rehearsals, demos, and live tracks from '76-'88. That covers the magical period when the Cramps were too high-profile to just put their name on cool old songs, and were forced to meet their own hybrid challenge.

Then punk broke at the same time as vital Cramps drummer Nick Knox. The band's never quite recovered from 1991's Look Mom, No Head! Their original audience seems forgiving. It's an older crowd. That's okay. The Cramps are an older band-as I'm reminded when the Chesterfield Kings keeps filling up time on the triple bill. This isn't some kind of mini-festival. The opening acts are there to fill up time so that the Cramps have to play a minimal set.

That's why everyone's so excited when the Cramps take the stage. Every second counts. Poison Ivy deserves credit for selective elective cosmetic surgery. She looks stunning. Lux Interior has been less discriminating. He looks like a young Wendie Malick.

The Cramps begin their show like every band that takes the stage with a stopwatch counting down the contractual obligation. Lux announces that we're all going to be getting crazy tonight. Hopefully so crazy that no one will notice that the Cramps have only been onstage for 35 minutes before Lux announces that they're about to begin their encore set.

To be fair, the show turns out to be a nice mix of newer stuff and vintage crowd pleasers. Never mind that their "Hanky Panky" pales next to that of the Lyres. Ivy almost steals the show when she actually smiles after a giant balloon lands on her, Prisoner-style. Lux and Ivy aren't hogging the spotlight, though. They've got serious competition from sex-symbol bassist/guitarist Chopper Franklin, who's movie-star handsome in a world where Bruce Campbell is a movie star. And that world is certainly the Cramps' world.